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Finally the Mediation Borg returned with

  • Finally the Mediation Borg returned with the Inflation Board. It was smirking. Even though they had no emotions, they were programmed with a bouquet of irritating gestures to

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  • make them seem more lifelike; "relieving stress" with Inflation Boards was one such mannerism. "Borg 11347 has achieved inner peace...unfortunately, 11347 has discovered

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  • that ignoring the collective's subspace instructions actually has no consequences. We need to eliminate the usurper before his idea spreads into the central consciousness."

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  • The alien's hive mind had one Jägermeister too many. The warrior drones were alerted and tried to apprehend the invading bar fly. The workers started to wobble out of step. Drunk,

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  • the bloated Monsiour Davenport stumbled bumblingly towards his escape balloon. The hive-mind alien drones were similarly imbibed, but Davenport forgot the umbilical cord he was

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  • attached to. It stopped him short in his tracks. 'Merde!' he mumbled. Monsieur Davenport looked behind him and saw the alien hive that had now blown up to three times it's size. Ti

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  • ny sparks flared from the nostrils of one of the aliens. Davenport suspected it to be the leader. "Mais zut alors!" he muttered under his breath. And looking the thing straight in

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  • the eye, Davenport made an OK sign with his right hand down by his hip. It worked! The thing looked down. "Ha Ha!" said Davenport. "Made ja look!" This further infuriated the thing

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  • which promptly sprouted hooked tentacles, subdued the screaming Davenport, and began to assimilate him. Within a few minutes, Davenport was one with the thing. It went off to

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  • Plaid Land to strategize against Flatland. With his last bit of human strength and breath and will, Davenport squeaked toward Collinsport, but it was lost in the fog.

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3 Comments

  1. Zetawilk Feb 26 2013 @ 23:08

    Where the hell did I get that from? The only Davenport I know of works at a quill and sofa store.

  2. BlastedHeath Feb 26 2013 @ 23:11

    There is a tide in the affairs of men ... and dens ...

  3. jayursus Feb 27 2013 @ 09:36

    I had fun imaging a friend of mine from Vermont with the last name of Davenport speaking French.

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