Welcome to the Turtle Super Express bound

Welcome to the Turtle Super Express bound for Land of the Dancing Cranes, next stop:

HELL. You will be arriving shortly with your fellow meatbags," the electronic voice stated calmly. I peered at the others on the train car.

Could the others hear what my metallic mother was saying to me? I was on the train because I was supposed to go home for Thanksgiving. My mother was Rhona, the robot maid servant

and sister to Rhoda the robot, who was played by Julie Newmar on TV's "The Living Doll". But neither my Mom Rhona nor my aunt Rhoda looked like Julie Newmar, nor were they even

robots anymore. Or in fact ever. They had been victim to the mores about automatons on TV. My mom Rhona and my aunt Rhoda were really cyborgs but the world heard robot and treated

them like they were capable of emotions and abstract thought processes. Because my mom was a cyborg, I was born with a telescopic robot MAN'S UNIT, which was a hit at charity meets

and corporate team-building events. Everyone wanted their own telescopic robot MAN'S UNIT. It became the hottest product to hit the shelves since the redesigned Easy-Bake Oven.

Sigh, the nostalgic memories of yesteryear hit the employees of the toy company and their innovation team just sat in regret. Nothing has ever come close to the Easy-Bake Oven 2...

hit that nostalgic hot spot. But that was ancient technology. Almost as ancient as when we built their Great Pyramids. Two days in a yellow sun and willing natives.