I did it! I got 10,000! This is by far the

I did it! I got 10,000! This is by far the most exciting day of my life!!!

Ahh, the milestones of life. Good to find moments that excite even further than the occasion of one's own birth. Granted, womb ejection was a traumatising distraction, but... Tip.

The man paused his existential tirade to solicit a tip from passerbys. Some people busk. Some people mime. He philosophically self-argued for cash. It got him through med school,

paid for his first beamer, and created the occasion when he met his wife. "Why me!" he wailed. "What is this absurd circus!" "What is ..." and she walked up and gave him a brumskie

and he fell in love. Many years later they were walking through a wilderness together when an alligator jumped out of a pond and ate his wife's left leg. He made her a peg leg from

his ex-girlfriend's dining room table, but didn't tell his wife until she had already become quite literally attached to the artificial leg. He'd slept on the couch for weeks.

In fact, if he were being completely honest, he still slept on the couch to this day. As for the ex-girlfriend, she had moved on, which was more than he could say about his wife.

The reason being was that his wife had gotten a gag order from the judge so he couldn't say anything more about her. He circumvented this by talking about his Jetta, referring

to his new car as "his metaphorical baby" and that his bitch of an ex-wife had "metaphorically crashed it into a semi truck going down highway 59 at 100 miles per hour on her way