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I looked into the sky and saw chuck norris

  • I looked into the sky and saw chuck norris flying, doing his paper round like he does every day at 3 pm, but today he had a brand new cape

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  • which flapped in the breeze as the mass collective unconscious turned ponderously upon the airborne Mr. Norris and, with a great psychic groaning, erased forever this joyless meme.

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  • "The cake is a lie no more!" Norris shouted. He then shower the crowd with many toys and went back to his secret lair just south of the Empire State Building's

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  • lava lounge. He settled into his egg-shaped coccoon and ordered a gin ricky from one his many minions. Soon his plans would come to fruition, soon he would the toys would...

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  • come to life and clean the safe whilst the oil magnet slept. The toys would not be noticed due to the stealth like

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  • grizzly bear doing cartwheels outside. "Will do acrobatics for hunny" the sign read.

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  • Ever since the Goldilocks incident, Gina Bear hadn't been looking for love. But when she saw that grizzly's perfectly executed somersaults, she knew she was the 'hunny' for him.

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  • She waited for the grizzly's acrobatics to finish, and once he was done, Gina Bear approached him and, with a seductive growl, asked if he'd like to go out with her sometime. He

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  • growled that he was free right now - whyn't they head out behind the woodshed and engage in lively bout of consensual bear fornication. Gina Bear wasn't sure if he was kidding but

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  • she knew there would come a day when she'd have to engage in lively bear fornication when she took the Bear surname. She pondered her decision making abilities as she greased up.

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