I looked into the sky and saw chuck norris

I looked into the sky and saw chuck norris flying, doing his paper round like he does every day at 3 pm, but today he had a brand new cape

which flapped in the breeze as the mass collective unconscious turned ponderously upon the airborne Mr. Norris and, with a great psychic groaning, erased forever this joyless meme.

"The cake is a lie no more!" Norris shouted. He then shower the crowd with many toys and went back to his secret lair just south of the Empire State Building's

lava lounge. He settled into his egg-shaped coccoon and ordered a gin ricky from one his many minions. Soon his plans would come to fruition, soon he would the toys would...

grizzly bear doing cartwheels outside. "Will do acrobatics for hunny" the sign read.

Ever since the Goldilocks incident, Gina Bear hadn't been looking for love. But when she saw that grizzly's perfectly executed somersaults, she knew she was the 'hunny' for him.

She waited for the grizzly's acrobatics to finish, and once he was done, Gina Bear approached him and, with a seductive growl, asked if he'd like to go out with her sometime. He

growled that he was free right now - whyn't they head out behind the woodshed and engage in lively bout of consensual bear fornication. Gina Bear wasn't sure if he was kidding but

she knew there would come a day when she'd have to engage in lively bear fornication when she took the Bear surname. She pondered her decision making abilities as she greased up.