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I am always amazed that when I pick my nose

  • I am always amazed that when I pick my nose in public I get that look. As if it is so foreign to people. Why don't they

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  • just understand? I mean people pick their noses all the time back where I'm from, it's actually a badge of honor to pick

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  • the biggest, slimyest roaster. Me personally, i just let them slide right down my throat. Or, i like to flick them at

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  • small children. I'm not saying I'm a good person, but when I hit a kid with a KFC roaster I personally feel

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  • like I have actually done something to help humanity. I mean, kids these days

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  • when asked what they want to do to give back to society they just respond, "Yo motha." That's so

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  • 1990, like slap-bracelets and hyercolor shirts. So, to teach these young thugs a lesson, we hopped on a short bus to

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  • country concert put on my amateur musicians. After this, they'll be begging to

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  • go see the giant ball of yarn. Anything to avoid having to sit through another minute of that awful

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  • knitting bee. I wished I had gone to the spelling bee instead to spin out words like stenosis, mephitic, and paean.

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