"Dear diary, it is after the Great Nuclear

"Dear diary, it is after the Great Nuclear Event, I am all alone and now I can tell my truth. I am the man inside the Kool-Aid guy, and now

I can be freed of my pitcher, my smile, and the constant condensate drips. The world drank the Kool-Aid this time and they're all dead, all but me. It is my time to

shit with the door open, to walk in the nude on non-nude beaches, and to scream when I masturbated. Being the only human on Earth was even awesomer than I had hoped.

Without the constraints of society I rapidly degenerated. Breaking into homes and peeing on the carpets, eating with my feet, stealing library books. But then I began to feel watch

straps tightening around my wrist. The Timekeeper had come to claim me at last. No amount of reckless behaviour was going to save me from the all seeing eye of the Ministry of Time

Not unless I went back to the Time Machine. Could I go back and undo my sordid past? But for that I'd have to first find the darned thing. Added to this was the fact the the last

person who used it hadn't set the return time correctly, and the machine had rematerialized in 1973. Since then it had remained in a cupboard, covered in polythene, waiting for

me to find it. "What's this?" I said, I pressed the inviting red button. "Please enter date" it replied, must be an old 70's video game. I put 5 december 1969. Sparks flew, and I f

ound myself in front of a newstand. "My God!" I thought, "Frosty the Snowman will debut on TV in 2 days!" I had to warn everybody of the future horrid reruns.