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while i was walking down the hill i decided

  • while i was walking down the hill i decided to jump accross the street and say oh my gosh im so in love i foundly found

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  • on the ground ,a big huge bug that looked just like me

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  • and it pulled a large .50 caliber pistol on me. Then it proceeded to pull the trigger with only the bullet piercing through my body. Luckly, it had missed my vital organs and now

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  • I thought, 'hey, free bullet!' Since 'free' had always been my favorite price, and about as much as I was willing to pay anyway, I had to take what I could. I suppose there were

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  • bullets you could waste your money on by actually buying them. Ones with a blasting cap, dry powder and up to safety standards. But free bullets were fun because they added a

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  • touch of lemon juice on the casing or whatever. The thing that goes into the body of whatever you want killed. That extra dose of pain in the wound. Yup, I work for the NRA.

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  • It was because of my work for the NRA that I was called upon to investigate a

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  • horrible disease that threatened to kill every single person in the goddamn multiverse.

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  • it appear as very expensive shaped-like diamonds

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  • But I knew, and he knew it too. There was nothing quality about it. It was a cheap piece of garbage and it wasn't worth the 19.99 that Billy Mayes was advertising it to be worth.

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