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Why do I buy such trash? I have a hedgehog

  • Why do I buy such trash? I have a hedgehog brush, a metal toothbrush, a rubber nail file, a pair of plastic gloves, cardboard socks and a paper shirt. Yesterday I bought a

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  • slew of names in the BlackHoleNamer Registry. Examples included "Vag," "Poop," and "Russell Brand." Long gone were the days of "Cygnus X-1." NASA gave me a call

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  • because they were strapped for cash. The NASA director said, "I don't know quite how to do this. I normally don't ask for money, but, we're in a scrape. One of our astronauts

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  • sits in a sad little corner and pretends with legos." NASA set up an ad to plead for funds. "Look at this poor rocket scientist. Not even a slide ruler. But you can help with only

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  • two thousand dollars in taxes per person funding our private corporation paraded as a government organization!" Now that the ad had aired, the four trillion dollar Lego experiment

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  • was underway: All we had to do was lure Betty White to a pastoral location beneath a giant hovercar with a crane underneath, and it would release $4 tril worth of Legos on top of

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  • a 50 square mile aquifer. Piece of utter disaster? More like piece of cake. Johnny was going to handle communications, while Dan would disable Betty White's vehicle. The plan was

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  • so simple that they went ahead without even realising that they hadn't mapped out where to go. The plan was thwarted when their vehicle sunk beneath the waters and they were

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  • getting deeper by the minute. Water began seeping in through all the crevices and crannies in the vehicle. From the surface bubbles of air could be seen glugging up from the car. T

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  • hen out of the murky depths an orange carp appeared. Using her strong tail and dorsal fin she raised the car to the surface. They all cheered as the silent carp silently slid away.

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