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Jeff Timothy the archaeologist dusted off

  • Jeff Timothy the archaeologist dusted off the ancient stone tablet, then dropped the brush in shock. It read, in plain English, "Hello Jeff Timothy, from the year 2016.

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  • You're late on your credit card payment, we have seized your moped." Jeff Timothy cleared his nostrils and thought real hard. The archeologist wanted to know how this ancient

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  • bald skinny white man with droopy eyes got the job as a debt collector. "You've taken my Moped? What's your name?" "Yes, and it's Mike, nice to meet you" he replied. "I should be

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  • off now. Bye!" I said: "Mike- wait. Th..." But he had already revved my moped to its max & begun descending Frisco's Filbert St. so I never got to tell him about the brake failure.

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  • Because the brake failure made me rear end a Ford Pinto. [So Jim hopped off his cloud, and let David tell his story on how he got to heaven] "Well, you see there's this giant...

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  • peach, and there's this guy, James. He's not giant. The peach is. Yeah, like, taller than James and wider than this room. Yeah, it's no believable but I'm telling the story, so..."

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  • Stunned silence, blank eyes."Ahem...so,giant peach...I mean, I had seen some big bananas back in the day, but THIS?James didn't seem flustered at all.He joked:'

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  • I bet there's more where that came from, right?' More stunned silence. More blank eyes. Did the giant peach seem larger than before? James couldn't be sure but

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  • Then it came from japan. The fukushima fallout had mutated everything, so yes it looked like we shouldn't eat it. James had seen photos of gargantuan squashes, two headed carrots,

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  • the occasional octopus and that Pokémon-figurine he had always wanted. They ate it anyway, not wanting to offend anyone.

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6 Comments

  1. mojozu May 04 2016 @ 03:59

    Jeff, Mike, Jim, David, James.. what.. haha.

  2. IceSquad May 04 2016 @ 04:14

    Dude, y'gotta pay attention. The debt collector is Mike, the archeologist whose moped he seized is Jeff. James is Bond, duh.

  3. Crazydance May 04 2016 @ 11:23

    Trying to combine a first person story with a third person perspective doesn't work, at all.

  4. IceSquad May 04 2016 @ 11:34

    Sage advice, Crazydance... IF the previous folder leaves you some clue as to the perspective. But WTF Jim and clouds :) ?

  5. RoboRoach May 05 2016 @ 01:50

    FYI It's Mike from Breaking Bad / Better Call Saul.

  6. IceSquad May 05 2016 @ 09:55

    Well, it's high time Stacey looked after her own finances.

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