Gwendolen was going to end world poverty

  • Gwendolen was going to end world poverty that morning, but instead frittered the time away on ebay bidding for oddly shaped vegetables. The postman knocked delivering a parcel

  • from Paris." AKA, Gwendolen was pregnant, again. The postman was the father. Again. But this time, Gwendolen was not going to take this pregnancy lying down, she was going to

  • take it standing up. That's why when Rugobert Small was born he fell on his head. Right from the start, life was a school of hard knocks. Rugo blamed all his troubles on

  • The obstacles thrown in his way, whenever he tried to make progress. One day, he found an electric circle and unplugged it before running to the bus, barely making it. The electric

  • circle sputtered in his hands, sad and sanguine without its life force pumping through its veins. He looked down at his beloved pet and said, "I'm so sorry - I had to unplug you, b

  • but don't worry. I will be joining you soon." A cold breeze fluttered through his hair & he turned westward, tucking his dead pet into his pocket. He walked for 3 days & 3 nights,

  • then he sat down to rest for about 23 minutes. He might have nodded off but when the alarm went off 23 minutes later he headed out and walked another 3 days & 3 nights. Then he sat

  • down when he realized how far he walked. "Oh wow!", he exclamed. "I'm At Alabama already!!??" I must have walked 500 miles! Trying to find a place to sleep after all his walking,

  • he was met by a couple of gals in black F-150. After a few pleasantries they said, "Get in" with a shotgun. "The fruit of our labors is about to drop from our writhing orchard, and

  • we're sure as hell not going to miss it." He sat in the back seat as the women drove wildly to the orchard and hopped out. One shoved a basket into his hands. "Get picking, chump."



  1. ACN Aug 09 2018 @ 11:05

    I'm baaaaaaaaaaaack...

  2. SlimWhitman Aug 09 2018 @ 15:22

    Welcome to AlaBAMa!

  3. ValkyrieGrrl Aug 10 2018 @ 06:59

    Bunnycookies: I love your sense of irony...;-) Good one!

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