Geraldine the gnu was feeling blue. She counted

Geraldine the gnu was feeling blue. She counted her toes again to check but there were three on each foot. Very un-gnu.

we should marry you off to Owen Wilson." But the Hollywood talent scout was just riffing. The limo stopped at a club. The three toed GNU peed on the bottle of whiskey.

..not top shelf stuff, but it was still a waste. The limo driver was new to the job, but he knew there was something off about that GNU. The club owner wouldn't let him inside,

suspecting that the GNU was underage. Now, if these people really knew who GNU was, they'd know not to mess with him. When GNU got angry, his gonads would swell, causing

other GNUs in the area to come running, for swollen GNU nads meant it was mating season. "Fascinating!" Professor Newell declared, scribbling in his notepad. "I never knew GNU nads

were able to reproduce at this astounding rate!" Regrettably, the horny GNU nads chose this moment to form together to make their final form, a huge

Sculpture, resembling something out of Burning Man. The gnus created their own newspaper and published it weekly. What's Gnus became the official propaganga rag of the festival.

But then Biggsby, some towering mountain man of very little words, entered the picture and started asking in earnest "What is Gnus". His hunt for an answer and how far it took him.

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