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Big Foot and the Yeti walk into a bar. They

  • Big Foot and the Yeti walk into a bar. They sit down in a dark corner. They order two gimlets. They take in the scene. Some hot young debutantes sit down with them. That's when

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  • I rolled my eyes at his joke. "Seriously? I've heard that one a million times. Big Foot and a Yeti walk into a bar. It's SO obvious that even I know the punchline - where they

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  • .." Just as I was about to reveal the punchline, a burst of gunshot was heard, and the window to my left exploded, showering the room with sunlit glass shards. I dove under the

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  • nearest table. Well, I tried to anyway. My big butt was stuck in the air & then...I felt a sudden sharp pain in my left cheek. I was shot! This was no joke! Desperately, I

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  • tried to straighten myself but couldn't because the pain was terrible. How could anyone even think that trying to do yoga in a public place could get me into such a mess.

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  • But since I was already mostly in bridge pose, my head resting on the bare ground, I tried focusing on the point in the grass where the trees cast their evening shadows.

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  • It was at that moment that a colony of fire ants started crawling on my arms. Did we seriously have to do the yoga OUTSIDE?! When was this bridge pose going to end!?!?!? I decided

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  • I couldn't take it anymore. There were hundreds of them now, crawling up and down my arms like little pinpricks. I fell out of the pose. Master Fu's eyes lit up in fury.

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  • His assistant was Orandilla, a Plutonian with a PHD in pinpricks. He recommended shock therapy. Master Fu said no way. Where was the ice pick when he needed it? It was at home.

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  • Master Fu was strapped down. Orandilla began the shock therapy with pictures of shaved kittens & worked her way up to hairy boobed female models. Amazing Mast Fu was cured! Lucky!

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