"Youse just shots a whole in my Stetson!"

"Youse just shots a whole in my Stetson!" The hombre pushed through the bat wing doors. "This woulda cost $69.95 at JC Penny's... retail!...during Crazy Days!"

"Not really," I explained to the customer. "See, you're only as dumb as a box of melons, but your 'partner' is about as dumb as the rinds therein. So you both end up being about

a melon head if you add your IQ's. Personally, I think your companion is the rusty wheel on your mental shopping cart, y'know what I mean?" He kept drooling on the bar code scanner

while I looked at him, bewildered. Was I just dreaming this, or did the guy at the check-out just get psychotic on me? I looked behind me, but no-one else seemed to have noticed

the mass of frothy bubbles accumulating in the corner of the check-out guy's mouth. I half expected him to morph into a werewollf when I heard a PA loudspeaker announcement...

Lycanthropic personnel working the night shift are reminded to wear their alphawave blockers due to the full moon this evening.The checkout guy nervously flicked on some odd shades

but Nelson, the assistant manager had used a mirror to bounce the moonlight right into the Checkout guy's face. The Wal-Mart shopper asked for a roll of quarters, but what she

didn't know was that the cashier had misheard her request. He looked up at her in surprise and worry and gasped. Quietly, he asked, "How did you know my garters were holey?"

She smiled then, appreciating the absurdity of life. "I'll let him wonder," she decided & simply winked at the cashier before picking up her packages. Holey Garters, Holey Kamoley