I could see myself laying on the couch. Flat

I could see myself laying on the couch. Flat on my back, eyes closed, hands stupidly crossed on my chest like a corpse at wake.When mother saw me ran she ran to me and knocked my

hamster up by injecting male hamster semen into the tiny rodent vagina. This is why I was laying so still. I took my female hamster and raised her legs up and rocked her because

I saw it in the Big Lebowski. Sure enough, we got babies. And boy were they a handful! Because they all fit in my hand, and I could squeeze them all like grapes if I wanted to, but

that's what my therapist bought me all of those grapes for. I didn't crush the tiny babies, I crushed the grapes. I saw another funny thing in the Big Lebowski. The scene where

..." But after 10 minutes of talking to the patient, Dr. Angstrom was bored to fucking death. "I never bought you grapes," the elderly woman reminded him, but still he happily

referred her to another doctor so he would be liberated from the endless boring utterances during appointments. The doctor was his rival, and they'd hated each other since they

killed that hooker in college and had her stuffed by a taxidermist, and had her mounted in an attack pose. His rival made one too many lame remarks about "mounting a hooker," so

he sold her at a yard sale, and used the cash to put a hit on his rival. Unfortunately, $150 doesn't buy much of a hit man, and the attempt resulted only in his rival sustaining a

broken collar bone and a very nasty temper. Needless to say, his rival was very interested in returning the favour. He skipped town. Last I heard,

Rod Stewart was thinking about reuniting with Jeff Beck and Ron Wood for a reunion tour! Oh, sorry. Did I change the topic too abruptly here at the end? My mind wanders sometimes.