Every cupboard in his kitchen...and there

Every cupboard in his kitchen...and there were many of them; maybe too many to count...every single cupboard was filled with unlabeled jars of peanut butter stacked 3 high & 4 deep

Do I mention the peanut butter? Is it something he'd want to talk about? It's everywhere... How could I not mention it? But maybe it would be better not to?

It was a sticky situation, but before I could say pb&j he put his foot in it. He was barefoot so the sensation was anything but pleasant. He flailed about for a few seconds

before he slowed, SLAMMED his foot down, and made eye contact. "This," he said in all seriousness, "this is the best day of my life". I was glad. At least he was happy.

Then he alternately stomped the accelerator and brake to progress an inch at a time, staring at me, giggling. I pulled the key from the ignition and swallowed it, then jumped out

of the car. His smirk slowly contorted into a look of profound confusion. Before he could manage to get a single word out, I pulled my own keys from my pocket, and ate them as well

His eyes widened. "You're crazy!" he shouted, reaching for the door handle. I tapped my stomach and the car alarm beeped, locking the doors.

The creepy red-nosed clown fidgeted while smiling as the car window quickly rolled up. He found his new favorites. Darius reached for the clutch and put the Audi in drive, I don't

do clowns, he thought and put serious distance between him and the McDonalds. He couldn't know that his Audi had reported the close call to headquarters and Darius would soon find

Stinky The Skunk had visited while he was in Wallyworld. Mickey D served Darius the best shit sandwich ever made. Even dogsup couldn't hide the nefarious odours. It stank!