The day was warm. I'd never felt the sun

  • The day was warm. I'd never felt the sun before, and the warmth coming from it was greater than that of any fire.

  • I gasped for cooler air. I knew I shouldn't have left the outer limits of the Basement Dimension without an AC tank, or at least a portable fan. The last of my hydration beaded

  • Like a friendship bracelet. The air was damp and smelled of mold, which secretly I loved, but who would have thought Candyland was so damp and murky? I started to get heat flashes

  • from all the up and down involved with those damn candy cane slides. The worst part is that because of all the sweating the slides were melting and I was becoming sticky with

  • peppermint. The smell attracted reindeer and not in a good way. I was too exhausted to run, so laid there and went to a happy place in my mind while eight reindeer

  • gathered around because of the pepperminty-ness & decided to play poker. One thing I can tell you with certainty, never, under any circumstances, fuck with a reindeer while

  • carving a pumpkin with a butcher knife. Aside from the possible physical damage one could to oneself, there is also the weird mixing of holidays, and that's not kosher.

  • Especially when my family invited me over for Hannukristmagivingween. That was just too much. I flipped my lid, drove all the way up there, and

  • was about to chew them out about their desperation to cram all holidays together & eliminate them when they shocked me to my core. "The Easter Bunny is your real father," Mom said.

  • I knew Mom was slut, but the Easter Bunny? It explained things, though, like my vestigial fluffy tail and a fondness for dyed eggs. Still, it changed nothing. Nothing.



  1. KieferSkunk Oct 07 2012 @ 01:30

    Well, one does have to wonder where all those eggs actually came from...

  2. SlimWhitman Oct 08 2012 @ 17:34

    The Easter Bunny gets around... Kwanzeaster and Grumpy Bunny http://foldingstory.com/plv7j/ Call me East http://foldingstory.com/za4g1/ The Starting Gun http://foldingstory.com/iuih8/ Cryptic Eggs and Tractor Beams http://foldingstory.com/xt95e/ The NY Rabbit Riots http://foldingstory.com/9dwj5/ The Chandler http://foldingstory.com/drs6o/

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