"Nothings funnier then nude people slapping

  • "Nothings funnier then nude people slapping each other in the shower! Am I right, or what?" "I don't know. I mean that was late night programming. But now we're talking about

  • a new prime time reality show called "Shower Wars." Hide the soap you-know-where,snap wet towels at each others' private parts,shut off the hot water & watch the resulting shrinkag

  • es and ball busting. The reality show "Shower Wars" was a hit in Vietnam. And this is what led to the United States and Vietnam entering their second war. But this time, it would

  • n't be so friendly. All bets were off. Geneva convention be damned. You'd step into your stall and BOOM Charlie'd be there with a cold water balloon. But we had a surprise for the

  • The electric sheep. They had just been to the parade for the World Series, all five million of them. Electric sheep were oblivious to the capacity for the park where their heroes

  • of baseball faced off. The electric sheep all packed in - like, really tight - into the park. But then, an unforeseen lightning storm came in and zapped one of the electric sheep.

  • That one electric sheep getting zapped caused all the other closely packed sheep to get zapped too. The ballpark was full of sheep afire and clumps of wool flying everywhere. It wa

  • horrifying to watch, and even more awful to smell, thousands of electrically burned sheep flesh and fried wool.

  • He could hear his father, lo those 33 years ago, making his crude joke about fried wool and how his good for nothing son would never smell it. Fuck you dad, I'm smelling it now!

  • He finished taping up his homemade fried wool air filter and inserted it into his home HVAC system. It was summer, 90 degrees, but he cranked the heat up to 110. Ah, deliciousness.



  1. Gibber Mar 12 2018 @ 23:21

    That's 32 and 43 degrees Celsius.

  2. LordVacuity Mar 12 2018 @ 23:31

    Thank you Gibber for the clarification.

  3. LordVacuity Mar 12 2018 @ 23:32

    I was a bit concerned about those temperatures until your clarification.

  4. LordVacuity Mar 12 2018 @ 23:34

    As I was trying to figure out at what temperature wool could be said to be fried.

  5. Gibber Mar 12 2018 @ 23:38

    I was thinking that he pan fried it with a little oil first. The furnace temperature is just to facilitate permeating the air with the smell.

  6. LordVacuity Mar 13 2018 @ 00:06

    Yeah, I will have to reread this recipe closer. I had missed that anointing.

  7. LordVacuity Mar 13 2018 @ 00:07

    Still the smell can be enchanting, or so I am told.

  8. LordVacuity Mar 13 2018 @ 00:07

    by Nobody.

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