In the future, I envision a world where you

In the future, I envision a world where you can control the temperature, where there's nearly unlimited food options, where you can pay for amazing entertainment, sex, drugs, what

have you. In the future, we will ride personal dinosaurs, wear powder-blue jumpsuits and eat food in a tube. In the future, we will send a cow to the moon.

In the future, everything will be possible; us mere humans will be the rulers of the world! But with great power comes great responsibility. What will we become? Will we

But then I started thinking about my 1972 Impala. If I destroyed the future, I'd never get to drive it again! I threw down my utensils. We'd have to take our chances with the ants.

As I set up ant traps around the kitchen, Bob Dylan's "Blowin' in the Wind" was playing on the radio. It was then that I misheard the lyrics as "the ants are my friends..."

But Bob was telling me that ants WERE my friends. I kicked away the traps and lay down. The ants swarmed over me and lifted me up. They were taking me to their bloated queen

. The Ant Queen's tail pumped out oodles of plasma coated eggs. Her faceless minions carrying the eggs off into the maze. When the ants forced me to kneel before her, her antenna

started moving like a biological radar. Like she was scanning me. Then, the Ant Queen started to speak. "Human, do you come here in peace?" Or - like your ancestors did many years

misanthropic bug bites & stings instill you with insecticidal rage?" I couldn't reply. I'd been transported on love's blissful wings to a clinic for the treatment of entomophilia.