"Shaking my chicken sauce, shaking my chicken

"Shaking my chicken sauce, shaking my chicken sauce..."

she signed off on our divorce. I was free to pursue my dreams of going into space to find an extra-terrestial girlfriend who would call me Earthman and pleasure me with tentacles

especially shaped to both envelope and penetrate my orifices in a way no man or woman had ever experienced before. I started my search with a quick internet query titled

"what to do if you get penetrated in all the orifices?" the internet had many answers to my question, and I took my time deciding which page I should click on. Unluckily, mother wa

ded into the internet pool and posted some pictures that I just should NOT be seeing. Pics I could not unsee. One was of her "albino rhino". I shouted "MOM STOP!"

"No," Mom retorted as she took another selfie. "I am doing me, and I am happy!" She yelled as she propped a leg behind her ear. I squeezed my eyelids tightly but the tears leaked

Out onto her Teflon pan, causing the chicken to stir up trouble. The zucchini and corn refused to cooperate. Mom suddenly noticed her broken leg was in the frying pan into the fire

phase again. That was weird but she was sure that is what it was. It was. Her mother powers were strong. The solution to the in the frying pan into the fire phase was to make each

pancake as modestly singed as possible. This she achieved by using frozen pancakes, but the results were disastrous and everyone wound up at Denny's. It was unmitigated Heck.