It's amazing thinking back to when people

It's amazing thinking back to when people had unlimited water. I remember just letting the hose run and run, water flowing endlessly into the dark green grass. Since the drought

, I invested in hovercrafts and pulled in my own personal berg. So while the rabble beg for a drop in the hot sun, I have it made in the shade. Sno-Cone?

Dwarfs my island, had since 07 from what i made selling nuke briefcases. Peering over my berg cooled Mojito at the mainland beach suckers. Why so pissed? Oh wow that guy's real..

My island is shrinking. Woops. It melted. Wait the ocean is getting shallow and tastes like Rum! Huh? There's a drainpipe at the bottom of the ocean? Aggh! It's sucking me in!

Through a vast network of pipes and tunnels, dug deep into the ocean floor, I twist and tumble for countless days. Finally I'm spat out again, waterlogged, into a gargantuan cavern

built by Kubla Khan when they really knew how to build caverns. Dripping, I walked up to the Xanadu passport control booth. "Purpose of your visit?" snapped the Immigration Newt

with the oversized monobrow, "and why are you so wet?" "Nevermind, that's over now, I am visiting Xanadu for business and pleasure, hurry up and let me through"

"Not so fast Mortal!" A flaming sword came up close to my face. "None shall pass except those who can answer this riddle, what would Jesus do?" I didn't realize Xanadu had come

was now out of my reach. I had committed far too many sins and regretted none of them. I'd rather laugh with the sinners than cry with the saints. Hahahahahahahhaaaaaaa!!!!