The answer? Mustard seed. The Question?

The answer? Mustard seed. The Question?

What is the secret ingredient for a nitrogen bomb strong enough to blow up my mother-in-law? "Oh that's right" Where could i find mustard seed I wondered? And then I remembered

Trader Joe's has a large spice section. "Now, a recipe." I looked on allrecipes.com. It recommended "Gluten-free Nitrogen Soufflé" for its destructive radius. My mother-in-law was

also highly destructive, but after due consideration I elected to go with the soufflé. It proved difficult to get the timing right, and I detonated at least five by mistake before

my date came over to give me a hug. I thought because we were outside the wind would whisk away the nasty stench, but of course, the wind died down. She hugged me tight. Sniffed

The ref blew his whistle and flamboyantly presented me with a yellow card. Who knew that onion-inspired halitosis was a punishable offense? Disillusioned, I removed my cleats and

sat on the bench. As I watched the game, now a powerless spectator, my imagination ran wild. I came up with a whopping 179 ways to kill the referee. The first three were simple of

ten proposed methods involving baseball bats or hockey sticks. I elaborated with viper pits behind home plate & tippy tennis referee chairs. When I published "Referee reloaded"

Oprah accused me of falsifying my memoirs and declared free chicken for everyone but me. So I sicced my bats to hurl baseballs at her until she learned her lesson. Free chicken!