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She pointed out the feathers, gags, & whips.

  • She pointed out the feathers, gags, & whips. Grandmama seemed to like those the most; she had a lot of them. She had her safe word tattooed on her lower back but we couldn't see it

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  • without paying her a quarter. Real customers had to pay a lot more. At 103, Grandmama was the oldest dominatrix still working. The Fine House of Pain in Antwerp had called her the

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  • Dominatrix to the Stars decades before she appeared in that sci-fi Blaxploitation movie, Dominatrix to the Stars in which she whipped the slave crews of star cruisers & loved ali

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  • en heartthrobs, murmurs, or an occasional arrhythmia. In the movie, was hopping from bed to bed whipping the seamen into shape. In the movie, the future ends up being her idea all

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  • egorically expressed as a school of minnows taking on shapes of philosopher's shadows, as the ocean of encounters pushes them this way & that. A giant whale surfaced & the sailors

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  • figured their time was up. Several sailors dove overboard, a few went belowdecks - one can only imagine what went on down there. But a few joined hands and prayed to Yahweh to free

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  • them of the demons who had plagued them so long. And yea, Yaweh had mercy on these few sailors, and took up the demons in her All Mighty hands and slapped them silly. So it was

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  • That Yahweh yawned loudly, prompting the demons to join her in a chorus. Morpheus showed up with a present for her birthday. It was a good 20 pounds. Opening the box proved quite

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  • easy since it wasn't locked. Inside was a 18# bowling ball. Both Yahweh & Morpheus accounted for the weight of the box & worked out that there was another payload in the box. "Bomb

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  • Inside,” said a sign on the box, which Yahweh and Morpheus apparently didn’t see. When they lifted the bowling ball, underneath was a real bomb: the 2016 remake of “Ghostbusters."

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9 Comments

  1. LordVacuity Mar 18 2018 @ 22:59

    I guess I have to watch that bomb at some point. I saw a few minutes of a very bad camrip before I gave up on it. Not because I had generated any conclusions about the movie to that point but because of how badly the camrip had been done.

  2. SlimWhitman Mar 19 2018 @ 18:16

    camrip?

  3. LordVacuity Mar 19 2018 @ 22:16

    People who go see a movie in the theater and record it on their phones or some other video camera to then post it on those “pirate” websites. The conversion from their video file from their device to a format to stream it is usually called a cam rip as opposed to a rip of the movie made from a high definition source like a sceener or a released dvd or blu-ray.

  4. LordVacuity Mar 19 2018 @ 22:30

    Screener: a dvd or blu-ray of a movie that is sent to select people usually prior to the movie’s release. Usually sent to movie critics or other people involved in the marketing of the movie or to voting members of Academy leading up to the Oscars. In spite of having strict controls and digital tags they sometimes end up being “pirated”. If you see one of these they are usually high quality rips that will suddenly show a message across the screen identifying itself as a screener and that is not supposed to be copied etc. Each screener has an I’d so that if it does get pirated they can Id who had been sent that screener. So maybe if that guy’s screeners keep getting copied, maybe he will be dropped from the screener program.

  5. LordVacuity Mar 19 2018 @ 22:33

    The problem with cam rips is that the people that do them are not always catching the movies at their best. I have seen some where you will see people walking in front of the shooter or the shooter is sitting way off to the side and you get a skewed view of the movie or they pick up the conversations of the people around the shooter.

  6. SlimWhitman Mar 20 2018 @ 05:16

    I see. Actually camrips with extra things like people's silhouettes from the movie theater or running commentary or even conversation spuriously related or completely askew to the movie's content could be amusing. Also a distorted view from the side could have interesting effects - like on suspenseful or scary movies.

  7. LordVacuity Mar 20 2018 @ 15:41

    Ah yes, you are showing your age. You are talking about a time when the movie going experience was, on some level, about a shared experience. That is not the case these days. People gather to do things together but not really together. Soon the only reason for this will be because of the magic of scalability. This ???? has been brought to you by the dead Ramtha.

  8. SlimWhitman Mar 20 2018 @ 18:52

    What do you call a rip that's translated by voice-over into a foreign language with the original soundtrack still intact (e.g. a deep voiced Russian fellow is translating all the dialogs and uses a falsetto voice for the female characters)?

  9. somesuch Mar 20 2018 @ 20:59

    My Dinner with Andropov.

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