I'm the worst procrastinator. At my wedding,

I'm the worst procrastinator. At my wedding, I sent an sms to say "We're through" to my Ex just before I said "I do" to my Fiance. The others at the PA meeting weren't impressed.

crying and locked herself in the hotel bathroom. We were married in Vegas, and had planned to spend two weeks here. I probably should have waited to spill the beans about my

family's documented predisposition toward alcohol abuse, high blood pressure and heart attacks, but the cat was out of the bag. Now I wasn't sure if she would stay the remainder of

the day. Figure he would pull a LeBron right at this time. The doctor motioned for me to come over. I pushed myself over on the rolling chair and the ear scope thing fell off

of my ear. She picked up the Lebron-brand ear scope and continued examining my ear canal. "Sir, you have a tiny man and woman shouting to be let out in here," she informed me.

A warm feeling swelled around my ear. I wondered if I imagined that for a second, had this couple lit a fire to attract attention? If so what could they have possibly used?

i heard a slight shout from the people in my ear. they yelled "we used you ear wigs" how could they possibly make a fire in my ear without me noticing. then a felt fire burning.

But I had no time to follow this thoughts. My tailcoat was actually on fire, and my bodyguard simply stood there admiring the way the smoke curled up from the silk and drifted

past the ends of my wig. I didn't panic, though, and calmly strolled over to the bucket of water, sat down, and extinquished the flames. Inspired by irony, I fired the bodyguard.