one day when Daniel Tosh came to the store

one day when Daniel Tosh came to the store evryone said GAY and Daniel said

"One day you're all going to understand," and he picked up a case of Genny Ice and a 12 pack of Jims, then headed

to the woodshed. He was conjuring the ghost of Larry the Cable Guy. He straddled his 4x4, cracked his first Genny, and

started to inhale the smoke of his black and mild.

He slowly let it out and started to think about where he could go next. Egypt? Brazil? Anywhere but this small town

full of small minded people. This money was his ticket and he fully planned on

using it to its full advantage. He bought a one-way ticket to Nashville, loaded up his guitar and was off. His dream was finally coming true, even though Simon Cowell told him

that he had a rat's chance of making it in Hollywood. But what would the British twit know about REAL country music? I was a star, dagnabbit! I was going to turn the

beat around. I was going to re-invent country dance music. No one could stop me - especially not Simon Cowell - he's not even *on* American Idol anymore. So, I grabbed my

pitch fork and fashioned it into a makeshift banjo. When Timbaland wouldn't see me, I located Cher benath a motel six sign three blocks down. At least he looked like Cher, a tragic

elongated man-woman with a voice that could cut butter. Problem is, Burt Reynolds had left with the Dilbert look alike to get "Moons Over My Hammy" at Denny's. So it was

then that I knew that Loni Anderson was right. This tool could just "Win, Lose, or Draw" his ass back to Florida. Just then, Dom DeLuise doused in White Diamonds said,

"I do NOT look like Chef Paul Prudhomme, he looks like ME!" He drew a pistol from his pocket and pointed it directly at an innocent bystander. Loni screamed "STOP! Let me

do it! You're innocent, but I've already been corrupted!" Loni plucked the pistol from his hand and shot the bystander in cold blood. "Loni!" he exclaimed, "You're a

extreme sausage importer, aren't you? Loni smiled, frowned, then smiled again. "Loni is only a nickname, you know. I'm really known as

The sausage "exporter" in my younger days I was in the wine industry soaking corks. I was a good cork soaker. Changed to sausage stuffing on a whim. I really like when I'm bent

over the kitchen sink and I can better control the

blood stains. While this step helped reduce further damage, I certainly regretted not listening to my wife when she told me not to carpet the slaughterhouse in alabaster burber.

Later on, beneath all the garnish and marinade there -- maggots wiggle and feast on the birthday cake. Pigs are pretty and pigs are clean; the rest are useful if you get em' mean.

Chickens dance and roosters sing; the farmers fancy cows that swing. Will looked at the folio closely. This was it. He'd show them that he was back -- there would be no Hamlet 2.