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"Say your life has no meaning. Say you're

  • "Say your life has no meaning. Say you're just a place-filler. Say your only reason for being here is to follow what everyone else does." That is what Herold thought when he

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  • stood in line at the DMV. Herold was a professional line-stander. He was paid by people with more money than time to use his time for money. It didn't do much for his self esteem.

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  • Still, there was no way he would ever give up his line standing. If you thought that was going to happen then you better expect standing in a long line a long long time. Line stand

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  • ing was a tradition passed down by his father, and his father's mother, all the way back to Old Margaret Oaklegs, who once stood in a line for nine years, birthing six children and

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  • and adopting three cats. Margaret Oaklegs' tradition hand down to him to stand in line. But the day came when he reached the end of the line. There he found the truth for which his

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  • -tory had suffered: a stack of old, clawed-up oak legs. Margaret Oaklegs' cats had destroyed them over the years, but she loved her cats so much that she simply replaced them. He

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  • didn't like how much his wife had to spend on replacement oak legs, so he asked Margaret one day if pine or even birch legs would do. "Oh no no, not at all," she said, "The cats

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  • would shred pine or birch legs. You need oak replacement legs. Oak will sort those cats out." "No Margaret, pine or birch is fine. With the $50 we save we can get matching arms."

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  • They decided to buy the pine one because Margeret thought it'd have a nice smell, but she didn't know that the scent came from the needles, so she was very dissapointed. Later,

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  • they burned the tree to get the last of its scent in consolation. They drank a bottle of wine by the fire and promised to never buy a tree ever again. The end.

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