15

Every strum seemed to have an effect on the

  • Every strum seemed to have an effect on the nature of our existence, our outlooks, and our world. We hit a C chord, sending pulsations though the foliage, vibrating in our souls.

    1
  • Yes, Dan Burderblatt had hacked into the PS3 and dark matter. He'd created "Rock Band: God Edition." His fake guitar could control the cosmos and creation right in his living room.

    2
  • Strumming gracefully on his guitar controller, our hero Dan Burderblatt attempted to tackle the songs from the God Edition of Rock Band he created - but even for he, the songs were

    1
  • frustratingly difficult, even reduced from their sublime composition to a pattern of color coded button mashing on a plastic guitar. Dan threw it aside in disgust, and his eyes

    1
  • wandered to a print of the Mona Lisa blue-tacked to the wall. 'Dear Lord, must I be always surrounded by near perfection, yet remain a miserable worm!' Dan thought, with fervour

    2
  • . He revelled in his misery. He looked at the smudge of mold next to "Mona". If he squinted, it looked like Rembrandt's "King Uzziah Stricken with Leprosy" & a stale breadcrust

    1
  • Casserole reminiscent of food rationing during world war 2 in the UK. Fake butter, fake chocolate, fake everything. Ramen noodles were plent,ful, even if loaded with sodium.

    1
  • I mean fake sodium. In fact, the casserole was so reminiscent of food rationing during WW2, that air sirens started going off, and the old Churchill speeches were broadcasted on TV

    3
  • Still, I had to try to choke the casserole down to please my stepmother, even if it meant enduring a hell more agonizing than the very beaches of Normandy. One bite after another,

    1
  • I swallowed the mini Brussel Sprouts, little cabbage heads they were. I swear I have been caught in the movie "Step Mommie Dearest! Then I reached for the coat hanger!

    2

0 Comments

Want to leave a comment?

Sign up!