The blue minotaur was back, and this time

The blue minotaur was back, and this time peddling his new book. "Iron Will wants YOU to buy 'Bovinetics', the astounding new almanac that can prepare anypony for the future!"

The Blue Minotaur passed by McDonald's. The frying beef flesh exploded in his giant bull nostrils. He saw red! Red lipstick around the evil clown's lips. The Minotaur lowered

his horns, snorted & galloped towards the crimson coiled clown. But Ronald heard the gallop & raised a red handkerchief crying "Ole!" He saw the Blue Minotaurs rippling shanks

and pulled a shank from his sock. He shanked the Minotaur right in the shank and again cried "Ole!" This enraged the Minotaur so he blasted Ronald McDonald with an optic burst

inator that Dr. Doofenshmirtz lent the Minotaur when his optics had failed. Man, I am too old for prison, thought the Minotaur, what if I could just be an insurance adjuster

the time of animal-hybrid stuntmen was a passing fad. I joined the rodeo and showed how to rope a bull using my own head. I had to pawn my BMX and run a lazer-tag labyrinth.

Hanging "You Are Here" signs in my labyrinth was the most demoralizing part. One day it became too much, and I went all Pamplona on a running laser tagger. "You got the horns!" I

screamed, as I summoned my minotaur companion. "I've got the fingernails! Let's mess their day UP!" We charged at the laser target, fuming

at the OPI executives who were trying to break through the picket line at the nail salon. No one could speak Vietnamese, though, so we gave up and went out for some good pho.