Finished Folds (221—240)
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5lowered him into the basement while blaring the lord's prayer through its mighty loudspeaker. Meanwhile, the lift whisked me up up & away into the dark & sinister mountains where
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6wishy-washy about what she gave away freely. Her body, house sitting, items of great sentimental value. "Wait, maybe instead - or no, how about I give you my credit cards?" Wesley
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4No, it was the start of a great day with a nutritious breakfast including juice, toast and Trix. Mrs. Butterworth was foiled again.
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5And all that poodle moisturizer slathered on your poodle will make it absorb moisture from the air like a sponge! It will swell up into a big squishy soggy wet dripping mess.
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2the fire hydrant with his big wrench. He almost had the cap off when his wife said, "Guess what's in the box." Dick loved guessing games. "A turtle?" "No." One final turn.
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5twinkles on the ceiling an all-seeing eye contemplating my baking gingerbread men burst forth from the oven howling and brandishing toothpicks I try to run but the cat attacks my
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3She took a big sip & sprayed it in his face. "No pickle juice! I like it!" "So why'd you spray it in my face?" "I do that when I like a drink." "Oh… wanna baby-sit for me?" "Nope."
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5d by normal people. I asked how he knew. The chief whispered to me what defines Wartbores. I was horrified. I didn't want to be a Wartbore anymore! I thrashed around purposelessly.
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3playing at the I-beam. I hate southern rock, makes me violent. So I ate an entire sheet of acid and went to the concert. Wound up at the Grand Canyon, thought I was hallucinating.
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7"act all snooty?" I was never more than partially snooty, & it wasn't an act! I stuck my snoot in the air. "I am 10 times better than you, you lowly canine! Bow down & worship me."
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4Poor Sven couldn't speak since he had sucked on the Thing, so he used hand gestures to suggest that they build a cabin of stones & caribou antlers and "make do" with what they had.
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8ass yelled at me. I laughed, spanking myself as I followed Rebbie into the club's swank gilded restroom to snort minced foldedstories on a toilet seat with a rolled up old $1 bill.
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7a waterboarding session. I felt compelled to tell the Chinese leader whatever he wanted to hear. "I expect the Fisherman's Shoes themselves!" I shouted & pounded a fork, sending it
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5sounded & Sgt Bun-Bun shouted, "Jump, you damn dust bunnies!" We clipped our parachute cords to the bar and 1 by 1 we leapt out the door. War is hell in bunny world. Adorable hell.
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1amused themselves with parlor games until they crumbled to dust, while we watched in our disembodied, sluggish melancholy, perplexed and slowly fading to nothing.
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1But jingoistic warmongers gave knives, clubs and spears to men so young they thought they would never die, and told them god was on their side, & told them to kill Bugs and Daffy.
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5"Hope is a cruel taskmaster." Another, "Why are you reading this? Get busy!" Finally, "This is the last day of the 1st part of your life." At that moment I realized I was a failure
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4he would be fluent with a vocabulary stripped of all words containing "p." He then easily dropped all consonants that used the lips: b, f, m & v. His lips were never chapped again.
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3If these bottles were laid end to end, they would circle the earth 3 times. Instead, they ended up in the Pacific garbage gyre, forming patterns like Nigella damascena flowers.
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4I wasn't taking it. I wanted a taco. So I left to find a taco truck. I wandered around town for FORTY-FIVE minutes before I found one. "This is an outrage!" I told the taco guy.