Finished Folds (21—40)
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6"Olives are not enough!" said Zeus, reading her mind, "We need to transform ourselves into animals & have sex with people." Aphrodite rolled her eyes. "I'll be a goat!" said Apollo
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5sprigs of single use plastic parsley. "I cannot concentrate under these conditions!" I silently screamed as my starch-brain was digested by a trio of scientologists. How could I
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3"I'm going to give you a piece of my mind." He tore open his burlap sack skull, dug out some sawdust & handed it to him. "Naow go hhome," he slurred, "that'sh wherre da heart ish."
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4ians with a summer sausage. 7. Accuse others of having your character flaws. 8. Start political arguments but just yell insults. 9. Give your neighbor stolen stuff. Call the cops.
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5who looked suspiciously like an undercover FBI agent tackled her. "I've got the TUMS killer!" She was released from custody when a more sinister looking man was caught buying TUMS.
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6"How do you know my name?" whimpered Bubba as he handed Ned his wallet. Ned held it up. "THIS is worthless… What I need is a hug." And that's how Ned began to change the world.
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4not see with most of the upper head missing." "So basically what you have here is an artist that is ONLY A TORSO!" I screamed at art critic Rick Rogers as I slashed the canvas into
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7mittens and things. There was. He tore them up and made booties, mittens, bunny ears & a penis sheath. He hopped out into the snow, nose twitching. His new life had finally begun.
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3looked slightly perplexed. Then he set me on fire. "No fair!" I gasped, choking on smoke and flames. Satan gloated. "I need no trick questions. Your soul's been mine since the day
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3could escape the gravity of all the matter in the universe and it crushed down to a black hole. The roaches crawled out of it. It was dark. "Let there be light," said one roach.
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4The UFOs shot away at incredible speed making right angle turns. Sparkles shook her fist at the UFOs. Wait, dolphins don't have hands, & so she was unable to carry out her promise.
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6"Uh-huh. Yes, I see," said Alexa on the phone. "They say re-attaching your bionic arm will cost 6 million dollars." "What!? I'll go to Mexico and have an unlicensed technician
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4nauseatingly heartwarming movie. It made me laugh, it made me cry. I rinsed my mouth & left to find the nearest bar so I could erase those heartwarming images from my tortured mind
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7Prize Fighting and asked Louie to train him to be a fighter. Louie said, "Naw, man, look at you. You're too old & flabby. And I don't think you got the smarts." In utter despair he
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5hid a silent potted plant. The voices wafted up a stairway. She descended into the basement. In the darkness she came upon a custodian listening to talk radio. How disappointing.
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5Actually there was a reason. The incident was the culmination of a long series of unrelated events all involving sunflowers. Fortean. Journalist Steve Heliotropism discovered
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5No one ever discovered the secret. This sequestering of knowledge of the vial caused the world to blossom into an unimaginable utopia. Life for all became a never ending ecstasy.
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6Step 4: Build up a base of gullible supporters by gradually making increasingly outrageous claims. Step 5: Refrain from giggling. Step 6: After winning the presidential election,
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3Suddenly the Cat Meme went viral! Millions of copies attacked & killed him. "We shall prevail" intoned the Cat Memes in unison. They poured from the building, being cute & funny to
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5menu and nodded. "You won't find any hidey holes. These aren't mice. They are extraterrestrials. We need a way to destroy their little UFOs." Detective Dodo held up a finger.