Finished Folds (2341—2360)
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2Rapt with anticipation we stood, waiting to hear a thunderous applause, but none came. That's when we realized that we had obliterated the audience. We slayed 'em. That's show biz.
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3Sneaking through the kitchen he was nabbed by the cook, who made him into deviled eggs. People at the banquet ate these eggs and died of lye poisoning. Chumpty had the last laugh.
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3When they arrived I was disappointed to find that they were mere sticks, but I planted them anyway. Ten years later they had become an impenetrable hedge and I was lost within.
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4-ological doubt. He left his practice and walked out to the hills, hoping to die from exposure. Instead he was adopted by a tribe of hippies and experienced spiritual forgiveness.
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5leap wide Martian canals in a single bound. They called him Supergramps, and when the Martian Concession stands started selling Supergramps t-shirts, planetary peace was achieved.
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4Now the Petrograd Lothario's photo would be in the papers and all those ladies he'd promised to marry would know where to find him. They would steal his Lotto winnings! They would
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5-ing ritual that required all of us to bite each other without drawing blood. After that we were considered part of the wolf pack. But Herman bit the wolf leader a little too hard
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3-mpet block Bread Apple's way, shooting death rays from her ample bosoms, but they were so ample the rays went every which way. "Foul strumpet!" Bread Apple yelled as he threw
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5time my mom called him back. "Your Mom says you're innocent," he said, "We're letting you go." But before they could unstrap me, a power surge caused the electric chair to flare up
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2-spians who had been waiting in the wings. A woman dressed in an ostrich costume screamed when she saw the corpse onstage. Keeping in character, she screamed just like an ostrich.
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3and had taken it home and baked it into brownies for the Betty Crocker Bake-Off. Betty and the girls killed off those brownies and boy, were they baked. The deputy won hands down.
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4They also have a way with hooves, as was evidenced by the two hoofprint-shaped bruises that appeared on my bottom soon after. I liked them so much I had them tattooed there.
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6Yes, but in order to do that you would have to backtrack back to the fork in the road, past the house with the sign that forbade you to pass that way again. Would you dare?
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2or maybe there would be even more than ever. Even now I sense the words "Dr. Who sensed something was following him- something from another dimension!" forming like Hell on a page.
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3They were also guilty of eating without praying, and by the time the nuns had finished smacking their knuckles their hands looked like personal pan pizzas. I'm glad I wasn't there.
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2"I know this will make me unpopular," Bubba began, "but I will no longer tolerate this sort of crap." He took off his baseball hat and threw it on the ground for emphasis. Enough.
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2You see, the horns on Mommy's Valkyrie helmet were carved from butter and the rain threatened to melt them. But Woton turned the rain clouds to snow clouds and all was right again.
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2. "You knew I was nuts about cars when you married me," she said. "But I didn't know you would actually leave me to marry an automobile!" I shouted, but it was too late. She and
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8"Obviously you don't count!" snapped the number 9. "Oh yeah? Well you're odd," 8 shot back at him. A pool cue interrupted their argument and sent them sprawling around the table
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3"Omigod, we're so sorry," a darn paparazzo replied humbly, "We're just so into knitting we can't help but spin yarns about it..." and he crumpled into a heap at her feet. She took