Finished Folds (3081—3100)
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3Everyone, of course, but Edna the cleaning lady. She would have to stay late sweeping the broken glass from Judge Judy's courtroom floor, and cleaning the blood stains from the
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5like the sister I never had. We'd go out for coffee and eat late-night popcorn by the TV, ignoring the show to talk about our deepest feelings. And we would weep together, this
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7a carefree senorita, even though I was a 58 year old married man named Steve. But that was my old life. Now that I lived in Central America my name would be Carlotta and I would
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4you return your tray-tables to their upright locked position and put your heads between your knees as we attempt a crash landing. Well, not a landing per se, but an actual crash
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6dreaded what the baseball restaurant employees would do if he yelled "Ball!" So he kept his mouth shut. "You're supposed to be the referee, make some calls!" snarled the manager.
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11"But Mr. Butterworth," said Madge, "how will we be able to get in touch with you in case Hollywood calls if you're playing dead?"
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8your carousing and drunken stupors. We are going to raid your liquor cabinet for your own good!" Emily started to cry, but by then we had all ready finished off her Crown Royal.
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5-dom fries. They tried Canadian Popeyes, but it was ll 'French this" and "French that". "French you!" he shouted at the counterperson, who immediately jumped on him and began to
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4asks me how on Earth did I do an old folks home. Very slowly, I tell them. Bada boom.
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4Derwood Kirby was sitting in a hot tub, beckoning to me. I pretended that I couldn't get my towel unwrapped and fled to the Ladies Room. Derwood lept out of the tub and was hot on
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4second left to go before the previous world was obliterated. So I think I know a thing or two about pets with emotional baggage, thank you very much. As for me, I am fine, in spite
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2everyone knows that an altered bull is not of much use on the farm. So Uncle Sam had a long talk with John Bull. In the end, they agreed that it was time to put him out
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3Margaret Mead. She may not have been that much to look at, but she knew plenty about making whoopie in Samoa. I didn't know which direction Samoa was, but I began swimming.
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4for a producer with more money than sense to turn it into a movie that will be overblown on Facebook and then will disappoint at the box office, only to emerge later as a cult hit.
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6one with the drawing of the lobster on it. The other one had a lobster with a drawing of a holster on it. Neither of them chewed tobacco. Hell wasn't as they had expected.
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1But when they asked him to play triangle in the Garden City Orchestra he crumpled into an infinite number of irregular shapes. Infinite, because he had been a god and never knew.
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5"Well helLO Troy!" they said, picking him up and setting his shiny heinie on their knees. Insert orgy scene here. When Troy woke up it was three days later and he knew he had
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4-ubtle and shadowy, that I had torn in the fragile fabric of time right there by the bowling ball polisher. He stared at his pins and aimed carefully, but just as he threw, a cave
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3A giant frog had stepped on Tim's house looking for fried maggots on a stick. The roof was now crunched in. "Great Mum, just great," steamed Tim, "First a nutrition lesson, now
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4-well Virginia honey-cured ham than vegetarian meatloaf, the cyborgs put whatever was in front of them intot eh deli slicer: the mailman, a fire plug, Mrs. Murphy's weigela bush.