Finished Folds (1301—1320)
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1The family of the deceased, however, were appalled to see their dead relative's corpse bounce out of the hearse and through the door of Ely's Vape 'n' Smoke Shoppe. It was no
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0-eking Vulture Cemetery to beg Roger Dirt's ghost to help on the recording. But Roger Dirt's manager refused to release him from his contract, even though he was dead. So David had
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3A nun dressed in a flaming habit appeared before me. "You have killed the Devil," she informed me before imploding in a sulphuric burst. I looked out over the city. It looked much
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0I didn't need a translator. I could pretty much guess what so many faceless avatars would be writing about. It was probably just one person, logging in over and over, trying to hog
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2His eyes hurt from trying to read the tiny print. He closed them, but there they were again, dancing on the inside of his eyelids like flickers doing a mating ritual. By the time
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3Dejectedly he began his long walk home. On the way he noticed a bus headed for Cleveland, and in a rare show of spontaneity, he leapt aboard, never to be seen in that town again.
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4a goo' boy. The thing that bothered me was how he went through the ice-cream, too. Didn't I give him enough parental love and doggy treats? Or was I to blame for his poor manners?
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5They have no memory of the incident, not do they hold any grudges against those that robbed them of those memories. They are the lucky ones. The rest of us will wonder forever
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4which may sound like a crummy gift, but burning it helped me keep Grandma warm during her last moments on this Earth. In her will, she left Larry her house and car, and left me
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4-ole engulfed them immediately, but instead of taking them to The Land of Death, it dropped Majandu and Udnajam off at a Cracker Barrel restaurant off of Route 66 near the border
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3Beth had thrown a drink in his face and stormed out of the bar in a huff. The simple-minded Soviet spy followed her out, only to find that she had escaped in a hot air balloon.
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4buzzer sounded. "What is: Guilt by association?" asked the Bishop. "I'm sorry, no," replied Alex, "Close, but no cigar. Off with his head!" The cameras zoomed in on the Bishop's
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3like one of those little rubber face-contorting finger puppet thingies. I was immediately sorry that I had told Lexi the truth about her brother. She left the room, then returned
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2refuses to use the automatic fish scaler to scale the fish. Instead, he uses his razor-sharp teeth. His method is not exactly sanitary, but it gets the job done quickly, so you can
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2I ran through the streets of New York brandishing my bloody fist like a banner. "I'm free, you fools!" I yelled, "No longer am I the slave of the screen!" But no-one heard me, as
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2-earning period. (I have no idea what this means, either.) By 3:24 that afternoon, the four of us had managed to have her committed to Medium school, and we left the grounds in a
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1They would have died, but just then the devil came springing out of the pits, a sulfurous smoke wafting from his heckish arm pits. "I'll make a deal with you, Chris and James," he
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5better than I had before, but once they put the apple in my mouth and baked me in a hot oven for four hours, basting me at intervals, I began to smell like Thanksgiving. I didn't
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5Violated raccoons from across the globe wrote in to the network, and soon Dr. Phil's show was cancelled. Secretly, he was relieved, and took a quiet managerial job at Taco Mojo.
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2"Going, going... Gone- to the decrepit woman in the back row in the tasteless bandana!" said the caller. Mrs. McGurk waddled to the front to pick up the vintage "Mad Libs" book.