Finished Folds (321—340)
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5school, metaphorically speaking." The voice sounded self-satisfied with its observation. 'Wait a sec -- let me jot that one down." Brock the Pupa was irked by the faceless voice,
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2A mutiny ensued. The insectoid crew, already disgruntled due to a reduction in benefits, captured and detained the officers. "'Music', you call it? It is beautiful! How dare you
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2Unfortunate for him, they could also hear feet. A Pteradonozombie swooped from above and snatched him in its beak, carrying him away to its nest. He would never make it to Jensen.
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6I was shocked how credible people were. The gullible will never be in short supply. "Joe Kringle," I would introduce myself, "brother of Kris." It was addicting, and lucrative.
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5Peter slapped his forehead, forgetting he was holding the pie. "Now he does!" he yelled, wiping cream from his brow. The wild clown snatched the cream-coated key off the ground and
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3and to the him in the passenger seat. It took a moment for them to recognize one another. "Gah!" they shouted in unison. The time-traveling AMC Gremlin had cloned the driver
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7a computer geek with an 180 IQ and the ability to speed read Turkish hexadecimal; little did he realize that ComicCon was in full swing and none were available. The evil scanner
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1"Don't drink and fold! DON'T DRINK AND FOLD!" [CRASH!] [@ Folder's Anonymous] "How many here are also alcoholics?" [unanimous hands] "That's what I figured. Now let's introduce
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3sometimes spontaneously metamorphosed into Josef K. This happened to Sid, in fact, as he lamented his true love's repudiation of his advances. Looking in the mirror, he realized he
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5Horsemen of the Apocalypse might appear at anytime, on any steed, so it was best to cripple every horse he came across. "Waterworld Taxi Service." Paul Harvey scowled. "That's the
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5falafel!" Bill O'Reilly, posing as a postal carrier, leered at Ma. Ma leered back. Linus emerged from the kitchen with a falafel plate. O'Reilly snatched the plate, and he and Ma
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6Det. Manatee smashed through the door and burst into the room. Waving an angry finger, he shouted "A Christmas crime!" Little Cindy Lou Who pointed at the tip of the tree sticking
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6tattooed on my forehead. I blushed. "Youthful indiscretion," I lied. The appraiser frowned and examined the #1 Uncle mug, and then Ernie. She shook her head. "He's not #1."
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3It was love at first sight -- only it wasn't, as they had met in a previous life. It was ca. '85, and Jodar and Hodor drank beer and listened to Zen Arcade with Tom Frank beneath
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3Famous last words, I thought. These junior interior decorators...they think they know it all, think that anything can go with anything if you assert with conviction. But mauve does
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6pointless, life and its typical banality, until I had discovered cosmology. Now, weeping amidst the corpses covering the beach for kilometers, my soul was again a starless vacuum.
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4His optimism was dashed when he noticed the black Smart ForTwo whizzing above the stopped up interstate. Lord Vader had swapped cars, and was using the Dark Side to
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7-bonic Plague Science Kit which he had buried along a stretch of state highway as a youth. His long search for a little buddy having proved futile, Indiana Geraldo wanted revenge.
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3I'm tired of fighting crime. Too much effort. Too many mangy dogs with hemorrhoids. What say we open a bar in Pensacola?" Dr. Chillbot nodded. (Ex-)Detective Manatee booked the
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6-lourished. His Special K and beer waterboarding training regiment gained traction, and soon hopeful Olympians worldwide were buying his $39.99 DVD collection. A dreadful accident