Finished Folds (361—380)
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4"Have you ever noticed how the titles for online porn videos sound an awful lot like Indian names?" My wife's observations had grown inane since receiving the iPad, a gift from
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3free rolled tacos if audience mayhem were to erupt in the arena again. He was incensed. "This is the last time!" he shouted, grabbing a hockey stick. He made for the stands
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9into the frigid air and called upon Zeus to dispatch my rodential adversaries to the Underworld! 20 minutes later, no lightning, and double the guinea pigs. Then, the Great Gazoo
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4"Rub a little on my lips," it demanded. I sighed and opened the desk drawer to retrieve the vial. This was the most disgusting aspect of this seedy arrangement with the typewriter.
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2"Is that so?" she replied as she seethed. Reaching into her purse, Verbena the Lemon Girl withdrew a small tin containing a singular gift for her lover: the Mightiest Lemon Drop.
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5and moaned and cursed the day it was manufactured. "Why, why was I assembled solely to slaughter these oddly-shaped creatures?" The haunted conveyor belt was not a natural murderer
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4is a letter which provokes nausea in me, thanks to said ex. Yet I often find myself seated on the mall bench facing this closed store, a lingerie boutique named "B", pining for
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7out of any of his 37 independent eyes. He had forgone a promising career as an optometrist to study the "dark arts", much to his candle-making brother's joy. Why did I love him so?
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6My theatrical adaptation of McCarthy's "The Road" -- loyal to the novel except for the substitution of the father and boy with Batman and Robin -- was a complete and utter
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7Gen. Bogusnachos! He is quite rich! There is gold bullion buried beneath his hot tub!" The rebel leader stared at Col. Buenasnoches, then signaled his comrades to lower their
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8"Poem for My Newlywed Wife on the Eve of Our Honeymoon: In the dark, my fart is as deadly as a shark." As my beloved lay in wait I beamed at her, deeply proud of my verse.
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3bit like Angela Merkel. "Miserable Lesbians," George repeated. "Is that Ibsen? The lead actress glared at him. "Nein." The female cast surrounded him, their arms crossed. George
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3u i o p a s d f g h..." Manatee caught himself. He was hallucinating that he was a keyboard. He threw the wrestler through a window and again spoke to Dugong over the phone. "j k l
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7him, closing in. He noticed the driver: Goofy! "Say, you're Disney, not WB!" Enraged, Porky pulled a switch on the dashboard and steaming liquid hogfat sprayed from the tailpipe.
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5Pinning the forensic quilt to her clothesline, Granny pondered the missing squares. The glyphs implied the Zodiac killer, but the pictograms were medieval: The Venerable Jorge?
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4And yes, they seem innocuous a first, minor disturbances in the realm of Scandinavian practical design. But the effect is insidious, often requiring weeks for daily IKEA shoppers
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4E CUMMINGS IT WAS A DISASTER. THE SPECTACLE OF BLAND SILKWORMS TRANSFORMING INTO BEAUTIFUL BUTTERFLIES SHOCKED HIS DELICATE BRAIN AND HE BEGAN USING CAPITAL LETTERS EXCLUSIVELY IN
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5d a new money laundering facility for it's clandestine H business since HSBC shut down that division. The situation was dire. Ronald needed his fixer. His agents located Grimace
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4a buzzing from above, growing louder at a rapid pace. The sergeant, the one we called Old Spice, spotted the formation. Pointing a shivering finger, he shouted, "Kamikazes!" I dove
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5"Discretion? Why would I want that?" She tossed the business card into a sewer drain. "This is the age of social media! I want all my social diseases posted on Twitter, Facebook,