Finished Folds (901—920)
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2to trek to S. America and single-handedly exterminate every last native village. Natural resources want to be exploited! These activists, they make me sick, with their colorful
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8I feeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeel -- like a nut ... "No," Albini cut in. "This is shit. Get out of my studio or I'll call up King Buzzo and have his boys do a number on ya." There was no way
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7"I do," he smirked, pointing at his temple. "This is my Harvard. My Yale. My Cambridge. My Phoenix. My Community College of Hard Knocks. My Trade School for Plumbers. All of the
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4the Godiva Board of Directors. "Here's what I got on Hershey," the prodigious girl began. Overnight, the chocolate world was shaken to its foundation. The girl, who insisted on
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3watched the spectacular fireworks show. John Travolta held me, embracing my head with his Old Spicy hands. He had killed John Lithgow, but too late to save me. In his eyes, the
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2pushing it into the water. Piranha and gators intermingled in the deadly soup. "Here, allow me," he said. When the woman began to scream, he ignored her. The vehicle cartwheeled as
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7micro-elves dancing on my rooftop. "Oh, not again," I agonized. Pulling my ladder from the garage, I paused at the doorway. This time, it had to be permanent. In the basement were
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3he was horrified at the discovery of one shocking guest: his mother. Louie hadn't seen her in 6 years. Why would she be at the party? And why was she dressed -- so -- ewwww. Now he
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3Hoosiers fans were rioting thanks to an upset loss to surprise rival Illinois. They were looking for anyone they could hurt, and a man as well-dressed as myself must have seemed
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4How horribly wrong I was. The penguin jerky market had been saturated thanks to the devious marketing department at Jack Links. Their spies are everywhere! Discouraged, I embarked
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3He scratched at his crotch, looking like he was ready to draw. I turned my face to spit, keeping my eyes on his holster. But when I spit, every tooth in my mouth was ejected in a
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4and my sour Bret. Chinese takeout would never taste the same again. I gathered their heads and the oranges and headed back into town, but had to pull off as my sobbing obscured
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3spacesuit and headed for the taxi station. Commuting to the moon every day was a pain, but lunar taverns paid bouncers the big moolah for the inconvenience and hazard. Some of the
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5heel would turn and turn as he lectured on lemon drops, lemonade, lemon Pledge. But the wisdom wheel had a downside: the occasional audience member would have a seizure due to
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4orchestrated with the buzzard perched on the shoulder of old Capt. Crayola. Streaky telepathically told the buzzard, "Keep the geezer occupied, and I'll tell you where the carrion
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5not before they had ruined the picnic. Renfrick dropped the insecticide into the basket. This had been his best chance to seduce Ness, but she would never grant him the luxuries of
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4Picking up his gold-plated bible, he swept it behind his ear before delivering a decisive blow. She dropped like the walls of Jericho. "Thou shalt respect thy husband, lest thy be
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1Snoop Cloney-Clone's mind: upon waking, he believed that he was Princess Kate. "Where's my tiara?" the confused rapper-clone asked Dre. Dre snarled at the hypnotists. "What the
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4that Mary Poppins is so stacked, and has retained her youthful appearance well into her 90s. "How do you keep your skin so marvelously smooth," I ask her, trying to get a look
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2due to his late realization that he would never become a pro basketball player. Even when he was young and in-shape, Picachu never would have even warmed the bench of the lowliest