Finished Folds (1121—1140)
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2"A simple chemical reaction. And you'll do it again." Brad knew the professor was right, it was a compulsion. He ate the snack, drank the soda, and began puking a caustic foam
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2piranha bath from the pantry! We gone get us some revenge!" The Danube Bros. had played their last vicious joke. I was playing for keep. Uncle Wilmer arrived and set the bottle on
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5wood reclaimed from a sunken Spanish galleon. The google@home guy -- whose name, coincidentally, was google@home -- was impressed by the architectural flourish. "Ya know, before I
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6only invoke my anty sense. I began to crawl over the carpet, sniffing for pheromones or sugars. My wife was buzzing loudly about in the living room, which was only unusual because
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2bank account number and ATM card pin. "Secrecy is a form of lying!" she cried before passing out on the dance floor. Bobbo looked upon her fallen form, feeling nothing. The cold
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0mountains. The globe which he had fashioned from neighborhood garbage was verisimilar enough to render the fantasy real, especially once he had inhaled the vapors from
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4the Pineapple Express. As the only train which allowed passengers of miscegenated fruit, many delicious bowls were the result innumerable steamy nights in the comfortable and
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2in your birthday suit. -- "Ask Ayatollah" had lost its luster, the advice becoming increasingly inane. "Tell me something I don't know," grumbled Tommy Basketball as he ate
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4McFadden threatened the orthodoxy of the fashion elite. That's when they called in the big money boys from the MIC. The Pentagon black budget allocated billions of "fashion bucks"
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1& Pitbull arrived in a gold-plated Mercedes. But as he stepped from the door, his head fell from his neck and split open, revealing assorted candies. The revelers screamed and
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7But you can do it on your own time." She replaced her spectacles and looked away from me. A kinder managerial class, my pretty little butt! Returning to my cubicle, I buried my
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3was skeptical. "I've come across your type before, more times than I can reckon. Just because I have metamorphized doesn't mean I am stupid." The cockroach, angered by the insult,
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5was the easy way, but we never went for the low hanging fruit. I wanted to eat the forbidden, fossilized meat of extinct species. I handed the shovel to my wife, pointed, and sat
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4knock this photocopier off my shoulder. Go on. I dare ya!" He removed a tin of seal jerky from his breast pocket and placed a pinch under his lower lip. "I dare ya." There was no
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2bother with dental hygiene in this day and age. All they want to do is the social apps. Just wait until these twerps have a root canal or two." I decided not to offer the spearmint
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3The pressure tore asunder their fragile bodies, but being undead they were undeterred. Heads rolled in search of lost necks. The cops laughed as they drank cappuccinos and smoked
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4"But is that what it's all about?" I pouted. "It's a big universe out there -- colossal -- is this the best we can come up with? Aspire to? Achieve?" She flipped me off before
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7was reminiscent of blueberries, swamp gas, and gouda. I removed the bottle of Lagavulin from my trunk and held it before them. The ladies smiled and giggled before one approached
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4produced a flask from her nethers. "F*** ascetiscm." The clever girl had fooled simple Peter into escorting her to a "New" Ashram, the character of which was quite the opposite of
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5"Epistemology? Quantum electrodynamics? International Finance? This was supposed to be about sex, drugs, and -- you know, whatever." Were her libertine family to discover the true