Finished Folds (581—600)
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5over the emergency eject button on his executive chair without realising it. The director was ejected through the roof and 20 metres in the air. Life is so short.
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5business shirts before starting the next stage of the ironing competition. It looked like Putin and Merkel would easily win until David and Obama brought out a special starch
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4At the graduation ceremony Miss Sahatharraingorgoatashuaniathinogorgoghogh awaited her name to be read out and wondered if her doctorate in biomechanical engineering would
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1Mr Obsessive-Compulsive had just washed his car. He then drove his car to his mother's house. Along the way he crossed a bridge with a Pelican sitting on a street light. Splat!
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2a shoe which he would remove from his left foot and wave at you whilst mumbling some incoherent Gaelic. The leprechaun was a cranky fellow ever since the Jacobite uprising
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5I first noticed the pox when I was getting changed for gym class. By the time I had finished school that day my entire body was covered in pussy sores. I continued to go about my u
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3I carefully carried the moonbeams home in my bra. After a night out swinging on a star I found the moonbeam in a jar. I considered feeding the moonbeams to my fish but
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5Aaaaaaah! The delights of scab picking. It shouldn't feel so good to self mutilate surely it goes against the logic of allowing your body to heal but yet
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3upside down and spilling all the fruit onto the floor. A bunch of grapes came over to look at the easle and was clearly unimpressed by the art. The mango
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1The Sullen Taser Drudgers stood over me menacingly and said "You've missed your chance to make a break for home. It must be those feeble legs. Your next move is
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1some of the ugliest weasels. They deserved to be stomped to death because they were hideous. I was glad to have given my cleats a test stomp. I found I needed thicker socks for
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1The Fascists had captured most of Europe. Refugees had nowhere to go. The Reapers were busy in the concentration camps. Hitler decided to invade Russia and Britain was on its
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1weather station. I'd been measuring the climatic changes in the region and found that a certain amount of cold water would provide sufficient data to prove
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2when I found an old letter with what looked to be blood stains on it I became suspicious. Grandmother had hidden the letter underneath a loose floorboard. I stuck my head
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1suck them out of my mouth and into his own. Gus loved me. It was a unique romance where Gus would come to my house with all sorts of
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5upper lip I considered throwing away my four leaf clover, rabbits foot and horse shoe. I felt so lucky I was going to throw caution into the wind. The steam engine pulled into the
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2drove a tanker truck that said "Cookers" which you could easily mistake for "Cookies" alas it just says "Cookers". The Cookie Monster collects cooking fat
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6During the night I feast on Knock Knock jokes. Did you hear the one about the cat and the latex thong?
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4giant pumpkin came rolling down the street and lodged itself in a pothole. The ninja squirrel slang awake from his snooze and climbed up the giant pumpkin in an effort to
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4scoop out the kangaroos testicles and make a lovely coin purse. You then sell the coin purse to Chinese tourists claiming it has mystical powers. You then use the money to