Finished Folds (201—220)
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2about??!" you scream into the black of night in the heat of your existential angst. Your fancy car and foul-mouth girlfriend won't help you here, no matter how hot she is.
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5the "Super-size Special." I won't spoil the surprise of what to expect, let's just say that Count Lala thinks he's funny by equating McDonald's with fat Americans.
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6somehow she made it work. It must be the soulful, pleading eyes. No one could resist her labrador charms and the coffee shop owners set out a bowl for her, filling it with decaf.
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2tried to put my English teacher into that erotic daydream of mine, but it didn't work as well. No, it had to be the scientist. He got my blood to burning.
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2of ramen to save up the cash for the upgrade to Direct Pervert TV. It was worth it, what with the scintillating interviews and the always-happening calendar of events. It was a
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4the dishonor that had become their legacy - that's right, Mongolian barbeque. If the Mongols could only see how they were remembered by their decendents, they would probably
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3contempt for the American Dream. Roman Meal wanted to much to be the country's favorite bread. But instead, it was the bastard child of white and wheat.
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3golden parachute in his office. Never know when you might need it. He looked over his bank account again, savoring the sight of all those commas and zeros. He had arrived!
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1and felt a thrill run through me at the thought of the Grand Prize - a lifetime supply of Shredded Wheat cereal. This contest was in the bag. I was confident that I would win. But
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3the thick of it, those 483 pages between chapters 1 and 57. I never write a second draft. That's how you lose the magic. I'm quite confident that this is the Great American Novel.
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5Texas. The company's breakthrough product came in the form of beef jerky flavored toothpaste. Those Texans loved it so much that a warning had to be printed: "Do not eat!"
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1get that Delorean to 88. I wouldn't be returning to Hill Valley anytime soon. So instead, here I am, stuck in the Old West with some dirtbag gunning for me because
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3I think you can imagine what I save my batteries for. That's right, my self-contained coffee heater. If there's anything worse than lukewarm coffee, I have not encountered it.
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1because after all, if a man is assertive, it's just a sign of his overwhelming confidence, right? Who wants a wimpy so-called "nice guy" over a strapping, sexy man?
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5And so, with a hung jury, he was free from the barbaric call of "justice." In celebration, he headed home with his clone and they rejoiced in one another's arms in bliss.
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4be many things to many people, depending on the strength of an individual's imagination and well... kink. Let's face it, not all uses of sauerkraut are pure. In fact, I liked to
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1any idea what he was. He was simply Grimace, like Goofy is Goofy. To tell the truth, those characters undetermined species messed up my head when I was a child. To this day,
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1challenge Death to a game. He was really pretty awful at games, but at least this way, he could say he went out with a fight. He was considering "Connect Four" as the means.
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5waist, held up by hideous rainbow suspenders. It may have been my birthday, but said suspenders and the Meco album of Star Wars disco songs had to be the worst presents ever.
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5feel of it, honestly. It was a mix of pleasure and pain like a loose tooth that entices you to continue to play with it. Besides which, Wonder Woman is an amazing hero for us all.