I gasped for air as the water ran down my

I gasped for air as the water ran down my face, rivulets cutting paths down my skin. I had fazed out again, and now I had nearly drowned in the bath. This was all because of that

routine mission down in El Salvador a year ago. We'd been taken hostage for a spell and after being recovered I kept having these blackouts. I got out of the bath, and noticed a co

lon on the bath tiles. it was surreal because I could swear when I got into the bath it was a tilde. Tildes occured frequently in my El Salvador slashbacks but this punctuation was

hanging with The Ellipses and wreaking havoc on Señor Clause (the stress had rendered Sr. Clause commatose). As long as the runoff from my bath water didn't run off w/ the Run-Ons

-tar system. Chevy had created it to get into the pedestrian market. Run-Onstar was a helmet that people on foot wore that asked them if they locked their keys in their

Chevy, a really slick marketing tool if they didn't have one. Since I did, I could just sit there, rubbing the tired out of my eyes and

singing Pharrell Williams' Happy song in my head. I tried not to look happy, though. They had to believe I was sympathetic to the problem. So while I feigned concern, I was really

holding back the laughter threatening to bubble out of my mouth any second now. I pursed my lips tightly & frowned, but my body was convulsing. I shuffled my feet & turned away. OH

my stomach and at the same time inspired me. I brainstormed and then sold my idea. In a nutshell, that's how Willy Wonka's famed anti-emetic Rainbow Drops came to be.