After three days of silence, the cat said: "I'm tired of your condescending tone." I was shocked! No idea such resentment could build up over a sincere "kitty kitty." The awkward m

Still here, the accidental pasta. I have decided that I will no longer wait for it to leave on it's own. I am going to eat it. That might be what it wanted all along. I don't care.

She was incredibly relaxed for somebody who had just walked away from a four car pile-up. The cop checked his notes. "Is this right? The woman who died at the scene was your

I told the pet shop owner, I was looking for something different. He showed me a terrarium with two mounds at either end. "They're war ants, quite amusing but never let them out."

Sometimes I like to sing. My elephant likes it. Show tunes, mostly. But occasionally I belt out some Sinatra for her as well. Until that awful day when everything changed.

I could use Google tools with...

At first light, she saw the tracks in the snow. Stepping back from the window, she put her hand out and pointed. But he wasn't ready or able to

"There once was a cricket from Germany No other was he, but Jiminy! While looking for a puppet found Kermit the Muppet who said crickets go well with Marmalade" So I've never been

I look out my window and notice a man standing there. His eyes lock with mine. As I blink...

The books opened one at a time revealing empty pages where once there'd been masterpieces. Gridley smiled and glanced at the ink on her hands. She fingered a spiral on the floor

She leant her forehead against his shoulder then wiped her tear stained face across his shirt. "I don't want this divorce." "We can't have everything we want, we both know that."

With friends like these, you have to wonder where it all went wrong. Jonas was always popular in his heyday, but he never imagined that

He grew up in Reading, Ohio, the second of 12 children in a working-class Catholic family. His father ran a tavern where

Monkeys like butter and banana flavored jelly beans, its hard sometimes to grab these delicacies from small children who

Every day he had to deal with the same thing. The same job, the same home, the same words. He felt like he was just repeating the same day. But that'd be ridiculous...right?

Can you hear me at the back? Right, I'm going to start this motivational talk by telling you an anecdote about my dog and there isn't the tiniest thing you can do to stop me.

It was one thing to read about them, another entirely to see one in person - the perfect coppery scales glinting in the hellish light from the magma pool, eyes like lasers seeking

Credible witnesses were hard to come by. Seeing a woman dressed like a male stuffed animal with all of the naturally occurring anatomy had become almost normal with the net, but a

The widow glanced at her watch and waited impatiently for the will to be read. It was almost sundown and if he was going to ruin it by showing up as a vampire, this would be his

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