On a trip down to New Orleans to listen to some Jazz music, Tinkerbell had a little too much to drink. When she came to, her leg was stuck in a bug zapper.

I got back from the video store, walked in, and checked my messages. Thirsty, I grabbed a Tab from the fridge and settled into my favorite chair. Oh cool! Cheers was on, and it was

Oh soft, through what yonder window breaks. Pizza, thy art the sun, and pizza thy art the moon. All that I see is inexplicably tied to

"Your band has 9 members but 10 drumkits. Why?" "Bastions of the Mind Shield preach the gospel of jazz metal, and jazz is about the notes you don't hit. Our silent Lollapalooza set

Marvin woke in the middle of the night after a leathery dream with drool on his cheek and a rabid bat nestled in his Movember beard.

Once upon a time there was a woman who tried to sneak her chameleon through customs by wearing it as a hat.

Billy Pepper was all about beef jerky, cold brew and hunting knives which made him the perfect

From the Hillbilly Dictionary, "Whippersnapper. wip-er-snap.ər. noun. A dang greenhorn fool who snaps his suspenders 'an thinks he's some kind a know-it-all. Nincompoop. nin-cum-po

5:44:13, 5:44:14, 5:44:15. There were only a few seconds left, before the boy was going to wake up. I hurried, placing it into my hand. I looked again: 5:44:55: Time for Plan B.

It was a dark and storm night when a ship crash landed in the ocean. Carrying over 5000 people to Africa.

You look like someone put a bright red fright wig on a skeleton and chucked it out of a helicopter.

The room was dark, dank and eerie. A single lightbulb was hanging from the ceiling, it flickered. There were no doors, only the gray walls that were slowly closing in on me.

"It's him -- Petrus Aurelius, the first Antichrist attempt. The carbon-14 readings were ambiguous, but the carbon-13 was off the scale." The group withdrew from the blackened bones

Despair. For some, it is an inescapable reality; despite their best efforts, an intractable sense of doom pervades. This, I realized, was my lot, when I recognized that the avatars

"Try it!" I will try it, asshole, as soon as the smoke from whatever you're burning empties from my lungs. You've got enough incense burning to choke out the dank weed smell, and

My lesbian mums...

"Come and look at the ground," shouted Elsie. A small crowd was gathering around her, some bending, some crouching. Someone dragged a grey wheelie bin over, opened it & jumped in

Ms. Sneedly gasped as she looked over Tommy' s shoulder. It took a moment for her to speak. "What did you draw there, Tommy?" she asked unsteadily, trying to smile. Tommy stared up

Murdock Lipschitz carefully removed the cylinder he'd labeled with RADIOACTIVE WASTE nearly three decades earlier from the vault at the back of the lab. He unscrewed the lid and pu

The stain on THAT bed? The one next to the poster? Well, let's just say. Wait a second, should I be telling you this? Do you have clearance? Let me see your teeth. Hmmm.