I got back from the video store, walked in,

I got back from the video store, walked in, and checked my messages. Thirsty, I grabbed a Tab from the fridge and settled into my favorite chair. Oh cool! Cheers was on, and it was

only 2.30 pm. Dentist Time!. Oh dear, I thought to myself as I was making dad jokes and watching Cheers in my favourite chair. I spilt some of the Tab on my grey shirt and brushed

it off with a paper napkin. I popped a Vicodin and took another swig of Tab. Then I got dressed up and ready for my dentist appointment. I hoped it wasn't going to be as painful as

what I just did with that paper napkin. Man, they don't make napkins like they used to. So there I was, at my dentist Dr. Gum's office...high, numb, and ready for anything. Dr. Gum

grabbed his upper lip and pulled it back over his head, revealing his pulsating brain. Why was I not frightened? "It's not a real brain," the brain telepathed. Now I was confused,

bruised and misused. The brain had me right where it wanted me. It was trying to find another host body and I was its next victim. As it pulsed its hypnotic torrent at me

it suddenly blindsided me and smothered my face in globs of grey matter. I fought, I parried but the brain was too smart and insinuated itself up my nostrils Egyptian style backwar

ds and walking sideways marching in with basal ganglia in a smart little to two step. I began to walk like an egyptian, talk like an egyptian and said "ܐߐ߄ߢߝਠਃਚ" My Egyptian brain

hemorrhaged...exploded...flesh-eating bacteria consumed my Egyptian brain...I developed Traumatic Basal ganglia hemorrhage...before long I was not Egyptian...I was an apple picker

in a small equestrian village. I tell people that I have Alopecia Areata. Even though I am no longer Egyptian, I still worship my pet cat and make batteries for no apparent reason.