The wild west saloon fell silent when Baby crawled in. Gun hand at his hip, Snake-eyes Muldoon spoke in whiskey throated baby-talk "Ain't you a cute widdle oobity-boo? Yes you are!

There were only three people in the world that can make pecan pie to die for: my mother (god rest her soul,) me, and a Russian hit man. There can only be one.

"Yes sir. Mm hmm. Yes. The human female appears to possess all the physical attributes generally prized by the male of this species. Right. OK. Well, do you want me to

Joe was half asleep when he felt the ghost cat jump onto his bed. Joe got up to look for the cat's companion. There it was - a dark shadow cringing in the corner over the door. Joe

Monsieur, at zee Otel Ducase zee Culinary exPeriance ees completement. Here you find zee Bath. In ze Tub an enorm souffle - just add your favorit engredient ze madmosisel, he he

"Sure, I've heard of spontaneous combustion...but an entire 3rd grade class?" Detective James Manatee said, looking down as the dozens of pairs of child size sneakers and piles of

As the family moved into their new three story home they were told by the moving men about all manner of history, from the indian burial ground the home was built on to the scenic

It's actually easiest to just start at the end of this story. Here I sat, celebrated war hero, Lt. Commander John Dykeson, about to take my own life. It had been a mostly good life

Today marks another day when I awoke alive. Will I ever awake not alive or in death will I never sleep. Thes questions any me every damn morning. Am I mad? No I'm actually quite

Wow, doesn't anybody still fold?

"So your the guy that bought the Nicolas Cage manor." said my new neighbor. "Why yes!" I said as I pulled my BMW into the gravel driveway. "Did they tell you it was haunted?"

It's a true and universally known fact that cats like to lick the inside of shoes. This pleases them and brings good luck to the owner. Once the shoe full of cat spit is put on

"And you want to be my latex salesman?" Harold figeted in his seat. "Yes sir. I'm the man for the job. Latex is my middle name. Well not really, but I like it. A lot." The boss

"I said I'd 'see you real soon,' Walt, & well, here I am," said Annette,cheerfully kicking up sand on heaven's beach. She looked around. "Where's everyone else?" Walt Disney smiled

Crime rates, global population, skin cancer, and gas prices are down. Why? Is it the increase in a police state? No. Alien Invasion? No. The Internet? Yes.

He was the perfect man. Sitting across from him on our 1st date, I admired his smile, the way his eyes twinkled in the candlelight, his laugh. Only 1 thing: Green slime was drippin

A bat can do enough friendly good however I just k

Eating a McGangBang is kind of like having a threesome with two ugly chicks. While it's happening you're stoked, but once you're finished. Well you've got a good story about regret

"Is it possible to write a serious, dramatic work of literature on FoldingStory?" The FoldingStory community laughed. "No."

"Could you hold this a moment?" the old witch said as she placed my heart in my hands. "Sure" I said as I fell on it. Her house and others on fire, Molten Man on the loose, it was