"To be a sandwich, or not to be a sandwich. That is the question."

On May 12, 2015, at 3:02 PM, Andrik Perrone was starching and ironing his shirts to prep for a new job. Then he started to think that it had been 3:02 for quite some time. He went

"The right hand didn't know what the left was doing!", Inspector Wojkowczski said as he sifted through the evidence submitted by Det. Manatee. Det. Manatee looked at the evidence.

Emilia knelt at the church. "Oh Christ! Save me from my sins!" she cried. "I took one too many free samples at the meatball shop and now I'm banned!" "Hmm. That is pretty serious.

This is a story about a sheep called Lola, she is white but she has a funny brown spot on her left eye.

"Okay Ryan," Martha started exasperated, "So what you're telling me is; you're gay, an angry midget wants to kill you, and you have an ancient relic from god knows where. Why?"

She was reminded of when she used to take her lunch hour in the form of a nap in a hidden corner on the cold linoleum floor in the Cold Room. Outside it was 110° and she wished she

Before the cranial lobotomy, I was deeply depressed--manic. . .to the point of suicide. . .but, thanks to the handy work of Dr. Demented, and the staff at Psycho No More, I am

She drifted away, on a warm Summer day, like veils twirling, shadows sterling, both the waves and sky; watched her disappear; growing distant more and less near, said goodbye.

Let tell you a story that was told long ago by the settlers of this fair plain. Those hard tack pioneers who tamed the West and built the first strip mall. Cinnabuns as far as the

Revolution was in the streets and the roads of the internet, but in a poor small bar, Ambrose Luxor took the stage and said: "The name of this band is Overmind Resistance." The 20

My downward spiral of phlegmy misery continued.Another Doctor visit.When he prescribed homeopathic arsenic I cracked."Listen you stethoscope-swinging smock monkey,I need Antibiotic

"Welcome back to Pimp My Ride. Today, we're trickin' out the Oscar Mayer Weinermobile. We're gonna take it from 'hot dog' to 'hot DAWG'." I watched in astonishment as the host

He rode into town on Monday (his horse). The actual weekday was a Thursday. Frank "the Bank Thief" O'Reily was an odd one. He wore one black boot and one brown, and he never forgot

Frank was a bald banker. Frankly, he thought, he couldn't give a damn about the economy. He wasn't married. He didn't even have a cat. But by jove, he had money. The thing was

He flew into a passive-aggressive rage and

It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man in possession of a good fortune cookie must be in want of a

The blue minotaur was back, and this time peddling his new book. "Iron Will wants YOU to buy 'Bovinetics', the astounding new almanac that can prepare anypony for the future!"

He woke up slightly groggy. Must have been some party last night. In his haze he noticed there was a red string tied to his big toe.

"Rub-a-dub-dub, Three men in a tub, and how do you think they got there?" Mr Porter scowled and blacked out "men in a tub".