I braced myself to leave the house, hoping I would not encounter my busybody neighbor. We had exchanged a few hellos in passing, but she seemed to take that as an invitation to

"I wanna dance!" she announced to the room. Everyone in the asylum turned sharply toward Anna, the head nurse. "I wanna DANCE!" she exclaimed with a kick and a twist.

I am not exactly famous for my insight but I am not unaware that my body and I are not the best of friends. Just now though I found myself and my body on the same page as I experie

It was my first session, she looked at me all concerned. "and How are you feeling?" I looked at her and cracked a big smile, "Horny."

'Near mercy' (in much the same way that 'near miss' signifies a miss) = 'Mercenary'. Coincidence? Perhaps. But to yeasayers, I tell the story of Barry the Mercenary Canary. He flew

Once upon a time there was a cute little girl called Lucy, and everyone thought she looked just like a fairy because of her delicate features and her friendly smile.

Yesterday, the Weights and Measures Board has discovered that a soul's mass dropped significantly since a decade ago. Are we less burdened? Where did it go?

I wanted a pudding pop but, every time I went to get one, the ghostly visage of Bill Cosby rose up before me. The same thing happened with Toaster Strudel - all I could think of

The slow motion aliens have finally landed. Everything in the world slowed down to a crawl. "It is to teach the human race patience & to learn to take time to smell the roses," the

I met a talking cookie named Steve and together we explored the pepperoni market in North Korea, together we rode a dinosaur named Ed, to find the perfect pepperoni.

This is a test...and a testament to trying new things. After all, what is the definition of insanity???

Once upon time there was a girl addicted to avenged sevenfold. She's the most famous hoe of the city,her name was Sofia.

I used clip on ties and shoes with buckles, tore open plastic bags with stay fresh ties a& managed to hide my inability until the day I was supposed to tie the knot. My fiancee

The ice cream man dealt drugs when I was a kid. A bigger neighborhood kid told me so.

The unicorn-jousting was going splendidly until I awoke with my knees against the ceiling

The mythicalness of this wonderful dress I found just made my day. Who could have left it for me, just lying there on my bed? I don't live with anyone so who could it be? I wonder

If I win the lottery

"Hello, People's Choice Bank. This is Dirk speaking. How may I help you?" "Yeah, uh hi. Please get a bag of small bills ready 1000$ is fine. We'll be by to rob the bank later today

Socrates got up. It was early and his toes were cold. He called his slave to bring some warm water. The slave came in. There was brown crap down the front of his tunic. Socrates

Her lips were as cold as her hands. He leaned close and caressed her blonde hair. It was streaked with dirt now. He wanted to cry, but no tears came. He was so sore from digging.