Perry White settled in at his desk at the Daily Planet and poured himself a stiff bourbon -- three fingers, no ice. He thought about how he had pimped out Lois to get the story of

I almost always get a little teary eyed at moments of greatness. Whether I’m reading something that is particularly well done, or reading the story of something great, I usually

Here are a few of my favorite things: the smell of fresh ground coffee, 49er football, when my kids are running toward me, getting into a groove on a nicely mogeled ski slope,

Gary knew that his days on Diff'rent Strokes were numbered. Charlotte had told him long ago that

Terricloth robes always seem to chafe me. I have tried using all sorts of fabric softening agents with no luck. However,

"I never could bring myself to massage feet. That's why I got my first divorce." I said loudly. "What about the second?" Harold asked over the noise in the crowded bar we occupied.

It was 10:30 at night. The sky had turned a sullen orange, and Jake felt more alive than ever before. The blood that oozed from his ears and eyes didn't worry him. The green ooze

Simon wondered when he should tell his date about his vestigial tail. Rarely did the topic come up naturally in conversation. Over the years he had learned it was better not to

Her new boyfriend and son hated each other. She needed something they could bond over. A video game, WII. She needed an edge, so she pepper sprayed the other mothers

There was a time when the blue was bluer, I'm sure.

"And if you look at a penny with 3D night-vision goggles, Lincoln has a Hitler mustache." Everyone oohed except Pete. Why did he let Stacy drag him to these meetings? He slumped in

I had a literary license .... to kill!

It was only two weeks before Cousin Corinna's wedding. Aunt Malda pulled out this dress that wasn't even cool in the 80's. It looked like a peach cobbler that someone thew up on. "

Slim pushed aside the old AM radio. The dust made him cough. "It's got to be here somewhere," he grumbled "Or else

The shivering young lady wept over the lifeless body of her baby son. She leaned down and kissed his cold forehead saying goodbye to him, he no longer would be living on earth.

He peeped into the Jim Beam bottle. It took him two years, but it was finally done, the entire Manhattan skyline out of balsa wood and toothpicks. Then he sneezed,

He'd had enough time to hide the body that'd owned the suit he was wearing in bathroom's maintenance closet. He jammed a key into the lock and broke it off, so it would be hours

This is your brain.

When you're the squirrel, you never really wonder. You just dance along the telephone wires and bury a few acorns. This, he realized, was different. There

There it was. A ruby-encrusted golden medallion. If only I could get past the case. I ever-so-slightly move the case and