He was a distinguished gentleman, sophisticated and debonair. So when his wife named their firstborn son "Porgy," he wanted to strangle her. Porgy LeMonde grew up to become a

"In light of the untimely death of Horace the Housefly, we need to pick a new mascot." The school board surveyed their surroundings. "How about The Gazebos?" "No, we should be The

The hungry space monkey goes to school on the moon.

The doctor looked at me. He took off his glasses and started to bite on the end. "You have..." he paused for a moment. "You have...zombie cancer."

"Hey Paul, a viewer sent these in. The Top 10 reasons to fold stories: 1. It's a place where your bizarre twisted humor is seen as a plus.

I'm here to make you forget that you don't believe in angels anymore.

The silent engines glowed like embers as the craft rotated itself on the W-Axis to realign with its original slice-coordinates in four-dimensional space. It then coasted down

So I quit my job then and went back on the road. I managed to land a gig here and there, none lasting more than a few day news. I blew into a town, played my set, made love to

They crinkled their noses, wondering what could make the room smell like this. Sally walked in and almost puked. There in the corner of the room was

Heaven's Gate cult leader Marshall Applewhite had the last laugh. The really hard last laugh because when they got on the spaceship they saw a bunch of Mormons on their way

The Department of Defense needed to get away from the controversial drone program. What they needed was solo armored divisions. They needed Combat Segways, and we were ready.

"What the dentists absolutely don't warn you about is the real and salient threat of contracting floss finger by following their proscribed routine." The judge removed his specs.

Cary Grant lifted Eva Marie Saint into the upper berth of their cabin, a salacious grin on his face. Principal photography on "North by Northwest" was all but in the can: all that

Capt. Cob re-lit his pipe then leaned against the taffrail, trying to remember some nautical terms. "Have the youngest 'prentice batten down the scuttle," he shouted to

One day I got bored and decided to make a golem. Finding the clay was easy enough, and I had the free time, so, before I knew it, I was standing before a 6' clay simulacrum of

I first heard about the speigle device late on a Thursday afternoon. Wow, I thought. 48 hours later and I won one on an online giveaway. By Tuesday it was in my grubby hands. "by"

This guide can be used alone as a beginner's handbook. To begin capitalist mediation you must first find a quiet place where you can block out

Dear Diary, I drew that "S" thing on Josh's hand today, but before 7th period, he'd washed it off. Hygiene is totes adorbs! I washed my Josh altar to honor his hygienic ways.

She shoplifted all the time. It was her "thing." She didn't feel guilty either because she knew that retail was just a hot bed of lies. It was her experience at the GAP that

"Today on Mythbusters: We team up with the Ghostbusters to see if Ghosts really do exist! And Adam eats Marshmallows. Lots of Marshmalows.