Finally I had the Harvard degree, the tailored suits, the consulting job, country club pass, the Lexus, & thought I'd arrived in Yuppieland, but then Tom took me on the Metrosexual

There's a man running around in a giant hamster wheel in the Ukrainian entry to the Eurovision Song Contest. Symbolism? The woman from Moldova just ripped her big blond plait off.

At the castle gate, the French army waited to lay siege. Inside, the English had run out of frankincense. "Can someone PLEASE dump the lair pots outside?" the King asked. An archer

The students of Menopeak High School were reading through the list of unusual careers on offer at the Career Day Expo. The first job offered was

Ήταν μια κρυα μέρα του χειμώνα, όταν ξύπνησαν οι σκαντζόχοιροι και είδαν όλη την κοιλάδα κάτασπρη!

I am an invisible mangonel.

Estaba en el embarque para Guadalajara, cuando vi a una señora vestida de fiesta y sin maleta, esperando un vuelo. Yo sabia! Ella iba para el matrimonio de su amigo.

A salute your shorts marathon was on at the same time there was a convention for Magic the gathering

I think I might be a porcupine because a porcupine would feel just like I do right now.

Stella Nova stacked her pancakes higher than anybody at the World Waitress Games. Juggling three plates of pancakes, two syrup jugs, and a cup of Ovaltine, she rushed towards the

If I go to bed now,

Weak with recent illness, Wilma played her notorious hoax on Fred, she got Dino to get up on his hind legs and

He wouldn't hurt anybody. He couldn't even kill a fly. Which made his job as a Hit Man tricky.

A ‘V’ of storks flew into Saint Petersburg Maternity Ward to steal babies again. Babies were Russia’s #1 export, so their economy was crumbling. Storks slew roubles, as well as

I had the weirdest dream the other night. I dreamt of a big fluffy spaceship manned by little fluffy aliens. Everything was pink and smelled of marshmallows. The aliens looked like

Tired of boyfriends who don't understand your needs? Husbands who sit on the sofa & drink beer? Meet Adam, off-the-shelf Individuality. Just download your desired partners personal

After being stopped countless times in customs due to my adermatoglyphia,I developed synthetic fingerprints from breathable membrane used in contacts. What started as a convenience

"Ok, put the Mackerel behind the wheel." "Don!" I shouted. But Don was serious. I pulled the oily fish from the tank and sat him in the driver's seat. It was a formula 1 car and th

"Krejomar, would you please shut up? It's wrecking the Gematria. Everyone else in the Cosmos has agreed to be silent for just this one moment." Urmok implored him, but Krejomar

I remember the greatest achievement of my friends. It was degenerate, chaotic and technically illegal but it was so fucking beautiful.