Chicken pen buyin' a Monkey's cousin eggs at your local market ya should always goose's Gregory Peck ter clock if any 're cracked. Wahn day I forgot ter goose's Gregory Peck me egg

"Where's the remote?" she asked dully, right at the end of the 4th quarter. I glared at her, but extended my retractable arm to change the channel. I had to obey.

I'd invited the regulars, Bob who brews Nutbrowns, Sam, the Pilsnerking, & Sally, the Amber-lady. The burgers were on the grill when I popped the unmarked bottle of Obama Honey Ale

Jerry was eating dinner when his wife, Brunhilda, asked why he was wearing a stupid hat. Why couldn't she leave the subject alone? Did he ask why she called her mother twice a day?

The Disco Ball was taken out of the sieve. They placed the sieve on David's head. David was strapped into the electric chair. He was given the switch so that he could self

There once lived a guy who lived a shoe. His shoe was way too big for him and it stunk really bad. Instead of putting foot powder in his shoe, he sprayed cologne everyday.

"What evidence do you have that the Zombie Apocalypse hasn't already started."

I am so sorry. I ate all of your peeps.

When asking myself a question, instead of picking pedals off a flower, I take one of the pedals and tear it until it can't be torn anymore. Each time in half and by the end of it

my name is antwan i am the best i like footbal

after watching My Fair Lady instead of the super bowl, Chuck was sure that he'd proven his love and that Nancy would finally give into his craven desire to

"RACISM! RACISM! RACISM!" He roared. Just in case we hadn't got the message he roared it a few more times before looking directly at me and adding "

Deep in the Inquisition Prison, party dynamics were breaking down. Mike the human Barbarian yelled at Steve the human Paladin "You're tough cuz your mom bought your armor for you!"

"Was the purpose of the folds on folding story to perpetuate a theme throughout the entire story?" he wondered.

The great cities have risen & fallen. Civilizations grip on mankind is weak & arthritic. Dark forces renew forgotten covenants. Primordial beasts reclaim the wilderness. Out of the

"Bread pudding is exactly how I got in such amazing shape!" Arnold Schwarzenegger definitely never said.

The wizard had said it might come to this. Always before, shouting the words, he had been clothed - here in the shower, would the Captain be nude? Would the lightning electrocute

After many lives of vile deeds he was finally reborn as a worm.Ah..The life of a worm! (S)he wriggled out of a muddy hole onto the pavement & let the rain pelt his glistening skin

Arthur was surprised to see a new face at the Round Table. "Tonight I am pleased to have the company of King Arthur of Britain and several of his knights," said Charlie Rose. G

"IIt tain't fair!" the troll grumbled as he tapped the screen. "Tries ta show me best side after them Billy Goats Gruff, but look at dose forums! Usin' my name!"